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| We're just strangers with some memories |
Many people do not like to talk with the stranger. Especially these days, when scammers are everywhere trying to empty your bank account.
Let me share you about my story.
I am an introvert. But since I often go out alone, travel alone, eat alone, shop alone, even often work alone, I realize that I have been talking more often to strangers these days. Sometime I even find it myself bizarre why I was doing it. Hahaha... :D
Well, let me share with you some of the occasions on why I talked with them.
My hubby works even on weekend. So I usually spend one of the weekend alone. One day I cycled to the newly opened hawker center in my neighborhood area. It was my first time visiting it and not knowing on what to eat. I ordered food based on my craving plus teh tarik, and managed to get a two-seat table in that crowded place.
I was sitting alone. But since the place was really crowded, one lady asked if she could sit on the empty seat next to me. I said, "sure!" almost immediately. Because, why not?
She was wearing apron and carrying lunch box plus water bottle filled with various Chinese herbs. Just by seeing her, I knew that she must be one of the staffs working there, going to have her lunch break.
Well, I am an observant freak. Hahaha... :P I often observe people in my quietness. I also like to read people's body language.
At first she took her mobile phone, scrolling, listening and sending voice message. It is very common to see people having their meal and focusing their eyes on mobile phone, as a sign that they do not want to be disturbed, which I do myself occasionally too.
Then soon after, she kept her phone into her pocket and started focusing on the steamed brown color bun, which was filled with vegetable, ham and egg in the middle, some kind of Chinese burger, but I was 100% sure that it was not sold anywhere in Singapore, which means, it was handmade.
I saw her eating and her minds seemed just occupied with some little thought but nothing serious or big in particular. Her eyes were blank and looking at afar, seemed not to any particular thing.
Then I guessed, it would be no harm to make a small talk with her, just to let her forget about her daily chores for a while, and answer them just as herself truly.
So I started the conversation by asking if she was working in one of the stalls here.
By appearance, she looked older than me (like in her 50s, with ahjumma style hair and dressing, a bit plump, and not too old). She was a bit surprised that stranger asked her questions, but soon, I could feel she became feeling relaxed and responsive well to my questions. Especially when we came from a similar background.
We both were coming not from Singapore, but have stayed for many years and settled down here. We were married with one kid.
From our conversation, I managed to know where she lived (not in detail, of course), when she started moving house in this area, how old was her son, which school he studied, which year, what major, what he liked doing at home, at what age he came to Singapore, whom she married with, where she worked (current and previous job), how long, what she did, nationalities of the current bosses, etc.
It was raining so I did not have to rush as I needed the rain to stop before I continued cycling, while her lunch break would take around 45 minutes to an hour.
The person looked approachable and I wanted to know how they felt (at that point of time) about their lives here in Singapore.
I mean, Singapore is such a small country but so many people have come here, to study, to work, to get married, to retire, and so on. There is no harm in finding out about other people's lives, not having particular reason in it. Just out of my curiosity.
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| Stranger talks :D |
Another time I chatted with stranger was when I was queuing to check in for my flight. This time, a young Chinese lady, a student, who was having a short holiday, wanted to continue her vacation in Hong Kong.
We were chatting high and low, up and down. She was so eager in sharing about her life. She studied in Beijing and I told her I used to study there too. When she asked me when, I told her that it was almost two decades ago.
She was shocked!!! She thought I was in her age from the way I dressed, talked, laughed. And when I told her my son was in 20s, she was even surprised!!! Hahahaha.... she must be shocked that all that while, she was talking with ahjumma, and not a young student like her :D Lucky for her that by then, we had reached to the check-in counter. After that, we both went to our way separately. :D
Since I work only with my Boss, I often go for lunch by myself. And I found out that I would chat with a stranger who share the table with me. Sometimes, I asked them how much they paid for the food that they purchased. Sometimes, I asked whether their food nice or not, whether it was worth buying or not.
Sometimes, when queuing for the food, when there was a 1-for-1 promotion, I even shared the promotion with the stranger who was standing behind me. First, I checked with her first if she wanted to buy 1 or 2. When she said 1, then I would ask if she wanted to share the 1-for-1 promotion with me and we shared the cost. Since it was half price, of course she said yes.
Later on, after she paid be through Paynow, I would be able to see the name. When the name seemed like Indonesian name, I would ask if she was from there and more chat would continue until we both received our order and leave in separate way.
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| Quote by Aristotle ("Man is a social animal.") |
When I was travelling alone in Shanghai, I went to the Shanghai restaurant selling the famous Michelin Xiao Long Bao shop. There were few dishes I wanted to try. But if I ordered too many, for sure I could not finish them. I ordered two dishes and took my seat.
After ordering, one lady who queue behind me, came to the same direction towards my table. Since she was alone, I offered her to share the table with me.
Then we started to talk. I mean, I started the conversation. Hahaha...
From there, I knew that she was Japanese, coming to Shanghai for short holiday, and travelled alone, just like me. We talked until our food came. She only ordered 1 basket of xiao long bao. So, since I ordered two dishes and could not finish, I asked her if she wanted to share my dumpling soup.
She must have read the food review before coming too and was willing to try. So, it was great. We could share more dishes and not let the food wasted.
There were more occasions talking with stranger. When travelling, I liked talking with the Grab driver (especially on the long journey). Most of them were local and knew the country really well. That was why many Singaporean taxi driver was famous for being chatty while driving their passengers (although many were complaining about the government :D).
I talked to stranger while shopping at supermarket too. While picking fruits, choosing vegetables, and so on. Sometimes I could get one tip or two on how to choose a good quality of food. Which or where to buy, and so on.
Talking to stranger. They were not necessarily becoming a friend, but it could fill some part of your time and share your life with others, so they not becoming lonely or feeling alone.
It does not mean I become a busybody or kaypoh too. Because for me, it was all just a 'hi' and 'bye' thing, a passing through moments that became memories in seconds. A reminder for myself, that I was not alone. Who knows what you do might help the other party one day.
Anyway, just wanted to share this bits and parts of my life with you here. If you also have an experience talking with stranger like me, and love doing it, you can share it in the comment here as well.