Saturday, June 17, 2017


It's a common sickness that everyone could get at anytime. But I couldn't remember when was the last time I had one. Considered me lucky?

Fever boy (Pic source:

Baobei, my dear son, got it the day before we flew back to Jakarta. At first I thought it wasn't serious. But his fever was showing a high temperature. And usually Panadol would be the first that came in mind to reduce the temperature down.

He spent most of his time sleeping so that he could get more rest and recover faster. I prepared porridge and fried egg by the time he woke up so that he could gain energy. However, the fever continued for the next few days until we had to give him antibiotics (without consulting a doctor in Jakarta), and cough syrup so that his cough could recover soon. And poor him, he had to stay in bed for the next 3 days in Jakarta and only be able to eat limited kind of food.

Dry cough came to me on my last day in Kuala Lumpur. I admitted that I didn't have enough rest during the last few days of my stay there. Additionally, the electricity in our hotel room was gone at 2am in the morning. It forced all of us (my parents and I) to get up and find out what's going on.

Trapped in a dark!!! (Pic source:

It happened that there was no window access inside our room and it was very stuffy if we didn't open our room's door. I tried to get down by the lift but it wasn't working either. And I wasn't familiar with the emergency exit door. Some exit door was made not to be opened from the inside. To avoid being trapped situation, I decided to check the hotel's phone number from its website (luckily hotel's WiFi connection was working) and I called them using my mom's local prepaid number.

They said they tried to solve it within half an hour. So we waited. I stood up at the door and held it open using my body's weigh. My father was restless. Still with an eye patch on one of his eyes (after doing his cataract operation), he walked around the room's corridor slowly and quietly until it scared the hell one of the hotel's staffs who walked around trying to find out how to solve the problem. The staff even scolded him (as he was scared to death by his appearance) and advised him to stay inside the room until the problem was resolved.

He looked as cute as this ^^ (Pic source:

Dad walked back to room and told mom that the staff thought he was a walking ghost. Mom started to laugh and I too, giggled quietly still at the door front.

We couldn't sleep with our door opened. It was not safe, especially Kuala Lumpur was famous for its high criminal rate. But we couldn't let the door closed either as it was stuffy and dark. My dad kept swearing with the condition and asked me to check with the reception if we could get a temporary room that had access to windows.

Luckily our room was located on the third floor. Still in my butterfly batik sleeping gown, I walked down through the staircases. Before that I saw people accessing that exit door. I asked them when this problem could be resolved. They said maybe 2 to 3 hours time as they could not resolve to repair the main circuit themselves. Oh my... I explained to them our situation and the stuff checked the possible available room for us. Luckily there was one not far from where we stayed and it had access to window facing the road outside.

We took our valuable stuffs with us and moved to that room. There was still no electricity inside but at least, the opened window allowed the light and fresh air. By that time it was already 4am in the morning. We had to wake up at 6am (so we only had barely 2 hours of sleep minus the toilet visit in between) to catch our morning flight.

So it was when my cough had started and it got worst as I reached Singapore. The weather was very hot. I took a bath once I reached home, took my lunch (a specially prepared fried rice by dear Baobei), and immediately went to sleep. I thought sleep could make me feeling better. I slept for 5 hours, then woke up for dinner. I slept again until the next morning. And I could feel it got worse instead.

What I felt (Pic source:

After having breakfast (simple porridge with siumai dim sum), I felt unusual with my body. I felt cold (despite hiding inside the blanket with no fan being turned on). Dry cough attacked me too. Then I knew something wasn't right. Soon I felt my whole body was in pain. So, this was how fever felt like, I told myself.

I slept again. I was awoken by Baobei's knock and he could sense that I wasn't feeling well. I asked him to buy his lunch outside as I didn't have energy to prepare lunch for him, and at the same time, asking him to buy lemon, bread, and milk.

My sensible growing up boy :) (Pic source:

Before going out, he told me that he'd cooked egg omelette with sausage since he thought I hadn't had my meal yet. Wow... I was impressed by his initiative!!! Because that was what I gave him when he caught fever. He was indeed my grown up teenager boy who knew how to give care and concern towards other people's feeling!!! Well done Baobei!!! Keep your mentality up in serving and helping others who needed it!!!

After a while, I took it and had medicine. I checked the temperature of my body, it was 37.8 degree Celsius. I took one tablet of paracetamol and when I woke up, I was drenched with sweat. The medicine managed to force the heat out of my body. But it didn't last long. It came again and this time I had to take two tablets.

My situation now (Pic source:

And now I was awoken by the complete silent and darkness. I didn't turn on the air con and the fan. Hubby had to sleep with Baobei in his room. Suddenly I just wanted to write my fever experience here, as it didn't always come to me (thank Buddha for that!!!), and still shivering with cold below the blanket, I would end this writing soon and go back to my sleep again... Just hope that I could get well soon.....

Wednesday, June 07, 2017


Jealous??? (Pic source:

Who said jealousy can only happen for young people? My dad too could still feel jealous, even when he's in his 70s.

We reached Penang just about the dinner time. The famous New Lane hawker centre was just in vicinity from where we stayed. We had various delicious local dishes and completed our meal with a glass of fresh ampula juice.

On our way back we passed by row of taxis that usually waiting outside the Sunway Hotel. Suddenly mom recognised a guy in his 60s who stood beside his taxi.

"This guy is... hmm... what's his name...," she was thinking hard, "Richard right?" talking to me and pointed at the guy. Upon hearing his own name, the guy nodded his head and smiling.

"We often used his taxi last time," she told me. "Do you still remember me?" mom asked him.

"Yeah, fifty four," he said.

My mom then arranged taxi with him for the next morning.

"Hey, tomorrow what time? 7.30 ya?" shouted Mom to my dad who kept walking in front. He stopped for a while, looking back and roughly answered, "As you like," and continued walking.

When we caught his steps, he told Mom sourly, "Fifty four. He knew where we stayed." It referred to the number of house where we stayed. I didn't even hear the guy saying it but he noticed. Then he whispered to me, "Like meeting old flame."

"What??" Mom asked. "Nothing. What tree is that?" He pointed at the tree near us and immediately changed the topic of the conversation to avoid trouble. Haha....

Jealous cos she is beautiful (Pic source:

The next morning the guy already waited outside the house even when we went down five minutes earlier. Dad sat in front. The guy tried introducing many places we passed by but he acted cool and not replied much.

That evening when we passed by the Sunway Hotel again, he passed remarks, "See, there are so many taxis here. Why must we make appointment with him?" Hahaha... 

When I told Mom about it, she was laughing happily instead of getting angry. So it applied to any women that they would feel happy when their men got jealous with other guys, even when the men was old enough :D

Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Gratitude breeds strength and miracles in life

Gratitude quote (Pic source:

On the last day attending my Uncle's funeral, an old man looking young, mighty, and bright, tall in height, came alone and walked towards the reception table with a white envelope on his hand. He dropped it into the donation box gently and filled up the reception book quietly.

I looked at his face and found it very familiar, as if I ever met him before. "I think I knew him. Who ah??? Couldn't be family member. But he's really looking very familiar. Dad's friend???" The thought kept running inside my head.

He looked around and decided to walk inside the room. True enough, he walked towards the direction where my dad was sitting down. As he passed by a narrow gap near where I sat, he walked and lowered his body down with a hand gesture, a body language known by Indonesians as, "Excuse me please," a very polite way to show.

The prayer to the decease was started. We were advised not to look at the coffin when it was being lifted and moved. So I decided to enter the same room and sit next to my dad. As I walked towards his direction, then my brain suddenly remembered on who the man was.

"Pa, Ko Asen ya??" I asked my dad and pointed my palm towards the man who sat beside him. It's better getting the confirmation from him rather than anyhow said.

"Iya," answered dad.

The guy looked at me and wondered how come I could recognise his name. I shook his hand immediately and told him my name and where I stayed. "Do you still remember me?" asked me.

"Oh... Ciao Ciao ya... Long time didn't see you, I could not recognise your face."

Grateful heart - magnet for miracles (Pic source:

Suddenly he joined his both hands in front of his chest and shook it lightly towards me, "Si mung," he said. It was the Hakka dialect words meaning "Thank you."

"How have you been? You must be in good health now!!" exclaimed me excitingly upon the chance of meeting him again after so many years.

"He is very good now. 100% healthy!!!" My dad answered on his behalf excitingly too upon my reunion with him.

"Ciao Ciao is very good," he told my dad.

I was touched. He might not remember my face after so long, but he remembered how I treated him back then, when he visited Singapore with his wife to undergo chemotherapy.

That time my brother was not around so his house was empty. My dad informed me that his friend would stay there to undergo the chemotherapy and I, who held my brother's house key, received them upon their arrival and told them to treat the house as if theirs (explaining where they slept, where to eat, the surrounding area, etc.)

When I was free, I visited him and brought them some fruits so they could make juice from it (he could not eat solid food after the chemo, and his wife would usually make fruit juice for him), asked about his condition, and gave some encouragement and motivation to keep strong.

Every time I met them, both him and his wife always smiled despite the pain that he went through. I could see how grateful they were to be able to stay at my brother's house in times when they needed it. You would have known how expensive accommodation fare in Singapore and they would not only stay for few days but few weeks.

Be positive always!!! (Pic source:

To be able to see him again, it was an immense pleasure for me. His fighting against cancer was successful. He was still the same person I met before, very humble, polite and soft spoken. He always showed his gratitude towards every little thing he received. I was very happy and I prayed to Buddha to grant him a continuous good health so that he could live his life happily, free from suffering, full of peace and joy in his life. Sadhu Sadhu Sadhu.

Tuesday, May 30, 2017


What life is??? (Pic source:

It's always a big question mark about what life is and how we supposed to live our life with. The birth day of someone can be the passing day of someone else. At the same very day, hour, minutes, and even seconds, happiness and grief can struck to the same person.

We all know, nothing lasts forever. Everything is subject to impermanence. And as long as we are still being born, we will always go through samsara or life's suffering.

We do things, contemplate, and learn the lessons. That's how we grow up. We encounter and go through life together with people, who we have fate in this very world.

Sometimes it just feels amazing to look back to where we were few decades ago. Some memory are still fresh and clear in our mind (be it good or bad), and some is purposely buried deep inside as if it's series of nightmares that we don't want to recall.

Relationship in families (Pic source:

Relationship between families, friends, our loved ones are fragile. A slipped word can hurt anyone's feeling. Just like the paper that is being crumpled, hard to make it smooth again. The mark has already been there.

Some people talk harshly in appearance but deep inside they care a lot and love the person they deal with so much. It's just how they hide their feeling deep inside. But many who don't understand them, will think otherwise. Well, we can't control what others think about us, but at least, let's control and be aware of what we are doing.

Each being possesses different personalities, thinking, and behaviors. That what makes life interesting. The interactions among them are just like the movie we roll and watch when we get bored. Many hides their darkest secrets, hidden scenario at the back of their minds, that usually found before the end of their lives.

Enjoy life today as yesterday is gone and tomorrow may never come (Pic source:

Hmmmm.... life oh life... I can't get it sometimes. It just varies and too hard to grasp and understand. If we think too much about it, there will be no end. Just do what we think is right and follow what our heart is saying.  Leave the rest to nature and focus on the thing we believe to work out well with our way of living. May you find your life journey satisfactory and happy with it!!! In the end, we will only regret for the chance that we never take. So, live your life today as yesterday has gone, and tomorrow may never come...

Friday, May 19, 2017

Thank you and see you again...

The day we first met - Xiamen (Oct 2007)

I can't exactly remember when I first met you. It was love at first sight. It was chosen, given as a symbol of His love, to protect me wherever I go in whatever I do, and put in directly in front of me, face to face, and it'd became part of me thereafter.

You were mixed of personalities, colourful, clear, transparent, and opaque, complete with your imperfections with black dots at some parts, but yet clinged very well into my wrist and arm. It made me feeling safe, secure, accompanying my whole traveling and mundane life journey all over the world.

Your sound was loud and beautiful. Many recognised me from your sound. Even without the sight of me. You protected my bones, my skin, from those things I carelessly bumped into.

When you rubbed into my skin, they said you'd improve my blood circulation, making me always in good health, which I have always been feeling grateful with.

Until one day, when rain poured whole day, wetting the sea and sand, trees and flowers, shells and shelters. I walked hand-in-hand with my nephew on the block of wood. Little did I know that the green algae was on surface. It made the whole block slippery.

First, my nephew fell. I helped him getting up. Upon my next step, it was me who fell. As I fell, my left leg kicked the air. I felt it touched my nephew who fell down again for the second time. I felt pain in my butt as it hit that wood strongly. Amongst my unconsciousness, I was reflectively protecting my head from banging hard into the floor surface.

Thank you for being with me (Pic source:

My first reaction was to check that my nephew was alright, especially his head. When I knew he was fine (he could even smile at me), I was relieved so much!!! Suddenly, I saw you lying helplessly, broken into two, with tears flowing on your eyes. Oh no!!! I'd hurt you accidentally. I'm sorry dear!!! I'm sorry...

People said that when you were broken when the owner was falling down, you'd sacrifice yourself to the owner's safety. It also a symbol to ward off the worse thing that was going to happen.

My first feeling knowing that you're gone was impermanence. That no matter how long we'd been together, no matter how we loved and felt comfortable with each other, one day one of us had to be separated, one of us had to die. I put you both together near to the block of wood where you sacrificed yourself and died. I left you there as someone came and immediately offered his hand to help me getting up. The rain was still pouring and it was getting heavier. We had to leave you there as we needed roof to protect us from the heavy rain.

Later on, when I returned back to get you, you'd already been gone. Someone might have thrown you into the bin. Haiz.... I felt sorry not to bury you properly or throw you into the sea to join the nature in a vast world. But you should know by heart that I always and will always feel grateful for your appearance in my life, for accompanying me for these past 10 years to wherever I go, in whatever I do, for keeping me safe and healthy, for your beautiful form and sound, for everything that you'd ever done to me. Thank you, thank you, and thank you!!!

Our last photo together (11th May 2017) - Leebong Island, Belitung, Indonesia 

I would never be able to see you again but you'd always be in my heart, in the memory of my brain. My love for you is real and boundless. May I see you again in my next life...

P.S. This post is written to commemorate my lovely jade bangle, gifted by dad, who bought it in a shop at Xiamen, China, almost ten years ago (Oct 2010) when we visited the country together. He put it directly into my wrist and decided to buy it for me immediately. Later on I always wore it with me day and night, 24 hours a day, until I slipped and fell down at Leebong Island, at Belitung, Indonesia (11th May 2017).

Thursday, April 27, 2017

Would you come back to Bhutan again???

View from my window frame :)

Here I am. As I look out from my window frame, the dream that I used to have, is instantly coming true.

"I want to live where I can see mountains and rivers from my window, fresh cooling air that far from pollution, wooden houses that looks very familiar and homey, the passing-by cows, horses, dogs, where their dungs aren't something to be afraid of, warm sun or sometimes foggy clouds overcome the sky above, and so on," said me to my friend just a month ago.

And now, the view of the Druk Air plane and its flying sound early in the morning, is a bonus.

We can't choose where we were born, but we can choose where we stay. Often times, second or third homes are necessary. Not that I betray where I was coming from. But it's just, those places are really where I feel like home sweet home. Although I can't stay for so long, at least I'm grateful that I'm given a chance to stay in certain period of time.

Amazing Bhutan :)

And what I love about this country, Bhutan, is... there are too much to say, simply feel from the heart.

First and foremost is its people, Bhutanese. I encountered many times during my visit here. Especially when on tour and to place where we did not know anyone or simply to visit a new place. They just asked their friend's friend if they know anyone that could help up with lodging. Amazingly, many would offer their help with their place, more often their humble place, to let strangers to stay for a night. They even provided us with meals (dinner, breakfast, and so on). They also rendered us with any kind of help that we required since we were not familiar with the place.

Life is great with you around!!! Kadinche-la!!! :)

Many Bhutanese would also help sincerely from their heart, and did not expect anything in return. Be it in goods nor money value. Let me share my experience here in Bumthang.

After walking such a distance to visit many holy Lhakhangs, my friend and I was tired and the cold weather made us a little hungry. I was in dire need of a sip of 'ngaja' - Bhutanese milk tea with sugar.

We entered to a general shop, located just at below the junction of the Kurjey Lhakhang. We were asking the young man, the son of the shop owner, if they sold milk tea. He said he did not sell it at the shop. Then perhaps our faces couldn't hide our disappointment. He then asked his Mom, an Angay in her 60s. Later on, he asked us to sit at the wooden chair with table provided inside the shop, as they would serve the tea shortly.  We couldn't believe it at first. "Really??" asked us. "Yes. My mom said she could serve the tea for you," replied him.

Both of us were smiling widely with an extra mile service rendered at this simple provision shop. We browsed the biscuit from the shop's shelf and chose the 'Dry Cake' made in Bangladesh.

Gift from the Bhutanese heart :)

The tea came and they even brought a tin of 'zaw' with it. Angay sat with us and chatted around asking where we were from, what we were doing before this, etc. And when we paid the bill, Angay simply refused the fare for the 2 cup of tea and only accepted money for the biscuit! Yalama... She treated us just like her personal guests. And when she knew we were going home, she asked us to wait for her son and wife as they were going to the same direction. Which means, they offered us a free ride!!! Wow!!! Wasn't it amazing??

And today, I had a walk on my own since my friend had to go to work. I went to the other side of the road and when coming back, I passed by the same shop. It was lunch time and I was thirsty and hungry. I entered and this time, an old man, the young man's father, attended the shop. I was asking him for 'ngaja' again, and using body language that it meant for tea. He said, "Ngaja? Mindu." It means, "Tea? Don't have." 

Hmm... it might not work out this time, I said to my self, since I faced with another person. Still, I went to the rack and chose my favourite 'Dry Cake' again. I took out my purse and pulled a hundred Ngultrum notes and handed it in to him.

My wishes for you...

He saw the biscuit. I guessed he might feel my disappointment. The biscuit would usually be the accompany for tea only. He then asked me, "Ngaja? For one?" In Dzongkha. I interpreted it as he held his finger so that I could understand. I said, "Yes, for one," I replied and showed my finger back to him. He understood. He asked me to sit down - at the same table and chair again, and put back my money and biscuit.

In a while, the same Angay that I met last time coming out and I tried to let her recall that I visited their shop before with my friend. She then remembered. She served me tea and I enjoyed it with the delicious biscuit.  And just like before, they refused to accept my money for tea. Wow!!! Weren't they amazing???

I really salute many Bhutanese who are just like them. Although they open the shop that usually to generate money, not everything is seen in money value. Their sincere heart to give without expecting anything back was something that not many could do in their lives.

Not forgetting this - the reason to go back to Bhutan :P

"So Rima, would you come back to Bhutan again?" asked my friend. With so many kind heart and loving Bhutanese around, there shouldn't be any reasons not to come to Bhutan again, even if I've come here for my forth time now.  The Lhakhangs and the beautiful nature are also my main reasons to visit Bhutan again.

May there will be fate and good karma in the future for me to come here again and again... Sadhu Sadhu Sadhu 

P.S. This post is mainly talking about the stranger who have done an extra mile in offering their kind help and assistance when we need it. So, not including those Bhutanese friends of mine, whom will drive thousand miles to render their love and care for me. You know who you are :)

Monday, April 10, 2017

The Unknown Land

For once I want to disappear, disappear from history, parts of my life journey in this earth. Where people will no longer remember about my existence or recall that this person was ever exist. It will only be the grey shadow as the name is mentioned.

Being the unknown (Pic source:

"Hmm... who?? Which one? Was she part of our community? Hmm... Sorry, I can't recall... I really can't recall..."

So here I am again. The stranger land, place I've never been before. Funnily, it gives me such a familiar feeling, a deja-vu, a feeling as if I was ever coming here before. The bright light, the buzzing sound, the passers-by. A land that never sleeps. People comes and goes, comes and goes... again and again... from different planets, different universe, where the rockets sent them from. They all wear different costumes, different footwears. This must be the place where I'm belong. Where no one knows me, bothers me, cares about my existence.

Alien in wonder land (Pic source:

Here my mind is wandering around. Part of it says, stay here and never go back. Another part of it says, move on and find a new place. The Universe is vast. There must be many other places that look just like this. Where no one will bother about your existence. Where you're the Alien of that new place. Where the adventure begins. Where your physical adaptability will be challenged to a higher level.

Finding where you belong (Pic source:

"Go buddy!" something whispered in my ears. Yeah!!! If not now, then when?? It's a series of looking and moving forward, live with a purpose, a new height adventure. Although it seems looking blur, but it is bright. The unknown future is awaiting to reveal. Pulling forward one step at a time until the new Universe appears and it starts all over again!

Sunday, April 02, 2017

2XU Compression Run 2017

It's been some time since my last blog post. March was filled with lots of books reading (thanks to the opening of the new Sengkang library :P), and morning walks exercise either with friend or alone.

Having fun at MacRitchie Reservoir Park :)

This Wednesday, when I was just about to start my morning walk at MacRitchie Reservoir Park, I received a message from my brother. He was asking me if I was interested to join him to run half-marathon this Sunday. It was free since someone had registered for the run, however, the person could not come to Singapore due to the expensive flight ticket (thanks to the this weekend's Coldplay's concert in Singapore ^^).

Hmmm.... half-marathon. Means, the distance was gonna be 21.1 km. In my life, I'd never tried running that long before. In fact, I knew myself that I could only walk and still manage to hike (although only to certain extent), but definitely not to run. My usual yearly run distance was only 3.5 km. When my friend was asking me to join the 10 km one, I declined almost immediately as I believed that my stamina was not good. I often lost my breath after running for certain distance and easily got tired. My heart would beat too fast until I could not take it. I held that believe since I was very young. So it was quite difficult to break that fear, and barrier that I set upon it into my own self.

I went for cycling in that distance before, but never for running. Even for walking, I was not quite sure. So I was curious how far 21.1 km would be, on foot.

In a crowd before starting :)

My brother was very active in joining this kind of run. He just went for midnight Sundown full marathon last Saturday here in Singapore and finished it in 5 hours and 50 mins. He even went overseas, like to Beijing, Bali, Bandung, etc. to participate in the running events and collected various medals. So I asked him further, if I could not run, and only walk, would I feel shame to be the last one? Haha.... He said, it should be alright as we would be given 4 hours to complete. He then gave me the link of the run for further information.

So last night I went to his house and slept there overnight. The run was scheduled to start at 4.30 am at F1 Pit. I went to bed at 10.30 pm but my brain could not stop thinking about what would happen and what had already happened. Plus the clock's tik-tak sound made me difficult to sleep. Only after doing short period mediation, I was then able to fall asleep (maybe about 30-40 minutes later). And at 3.15 am, I was awoken and got ready.

Three of us took the Uber cab to the nearest stop towards F1 pit and my brother immediately found his friends and colleagues who were also joining. There were so many people lining up towards the Start line and we were the seventh wave in the group and started our run only at 5.22 am.

Became a tourist too :P

Slowly I was separated from my the rest. I ran and walked in my own pace. I realized I learned few things from this run. First, everyone was just doing their best. They ran as they could. It was not really about who was the fastest, but everyone was trying to balance their energy with the distance, the intake (water, sport drink, and banana provided by the organiser), the output (if you chose to visit toilet in the middle of your journey), the strength of their legs, knees, ankles, and so on. Second, fun was definitely a must. I mean, yes we had a goal to achieve, but in order to reach, we should put in some fun and took a necessary rest in between (many stopped for taking photos of the beautiful Singapore sites and keeping the memories with people who they went for the run with).

Quote by Haruki Murakami from 'What I talk about when I talk about running'

Third, the only person you had to defeat in this, was yourself. Because everyone started at different timing, at different wave groups. So you wouldn't know how much they had achieved by the time you saw them. And I guessed it wasn't necessarily important to compete that way, unless you're into a competition that you were aiming to win. Instead, you might want to defeat your own previous record (if you joined such run before), defeat your own barrier that you set upon yourself (just like my own self who only dared to run at 3.5 km distance yearly), and so on.

And when you were in the group, you saw people around you running. You were automatically getting such motivation to run as well. And concentration was required as you had to decide when to continue run and when to just walk while catching your breath. I counted my own pace when walking and running.

The distance should be around 21.1 km :)

Overall, I found that my first experience in half-marathon was pretty good. Thanks to the morning walk exercise that I had during the past few weeks. The breath, the heart beat, the legs works, were in good balance. I finished it in 3 hours and 9 minutes (The photo above was using my phone Apps which might not give a very accurate result. The distance should be around 21.1 km and the timing as I just mentioned). From the 2XU race result, my rank was 3786 out of 6966).

With my sis-in-law and brother. Thank you!!! :)

It was really great experience and thank you for the person who could not attend the run, my brother, and sis-in-law for the opportunity, for the advise given before the run, for answering my doubts and fear before the run started, for accompanying me, and so on. I was glad and never expected to join such run in my whole life, but I finally did. Thank you, thank you, and thank you so much for everything!!!

Glad that I made it! :) Thank you!

Also thank you for the above for listening to our prayers that we had gone through it safely, in good health, great weather (it was almost rain but suddenly stopped), enough energy intake along the way, and the priceless experience and memories in our lives. And the moral support from my beloved one. At least when I died, I knew that I had lived my life to the fullest each and every day, experiencing many things that I wished to do while I was alive. Thank you, thank you, and thank you... May all sentient beings be healthy and happy, free from suffering, and life filled with peace and joy. Sadhu, Sadhu, Sadhu.

Friday, March 10, 2017

I was once lived in fairy tales

Two lovebirds (Photo source:

Hand-in-hand we walked out from the well-known five stars hotel's located in the heart of Singapore city happily. Just like a newly wed couple who went for honeymoon, our faces were shining brightly.

"Where shall we eat tonight?" he asked.

"Hmmm.... let's go to the Esplanade side. There must be some food stalls over there," answered me.

"Any specific food you want to eat tonight?" 
asked him again.

"Well, any food will taste great as long as you're there beside me," answered me while smiling wide.

"Hahaha.... You ahhh....," he laughed gently while his hand messed my hair.

He was almost two heads taller than me. With height of 1.85m, he was often called 'giraffe' by his fellow friends.

We crossed the road illegally (jaywalking - that's what they called), but no fear, as long he was there beside me.

Bright full moon (Pic source:

Once we reached towards the Singapore river side, "Huaaaaa...... see the moon tonight???" exclaimed me with head pointed towards the sky. "It's very very beautiful, isn't it??" I was so exciting looking at it!

We stopped for a while, treasuring the moments just to enjoy the beautiful moon view up there. The reflection could be seen under the water, made it miraculously beautiful!!!

He extended both his arms towards me from behind, hugged me tight, unwanted to let me go. "It's beautiful dear. Just like you." He rested his chin on my head and tighten his hug. I could smell his perfume clearly from his shirts, a strong yet manly kind of smell, my favorite.

"If only the world stops evolving right this second," told me inside my heart.

"I love you," I said.

"I love you too," he replied.

After a while, "Come, let's eat. I start getting hungry now," he said.

"Alright. Me too."

We passed by few makan places and he decided to eat at Asian Thai restaurant. Been away from Asia for few years made him appreciating Asian food more.

"Table for two please," said him to the waiter.

"This way please," replied the waiter while showed us the way towards the two-seat table outdoor. "Is outdoor OK for you Sir?" asked the waiter.

Since it was a cooling night, he agreed to the waiter's suggestion almost immediately. "Yes, it's perfectly fine. Thank you."

He pulled the chair and let me sit gentlemanly. I sat down and he followed. "So? What do your want to order?" asked him. "Hmmm... you decide and we can share our meal," replied me, since he was the one who had the craving towards Asian food. For me, I could get it anytime anywhere here in Singapore.

"One Thai fried rice and one Pad Thai set please," he said his order to the waiter. "And two ice Thai milk tea."

Once the waiter went away, he took my palm that rested on the table. He rubbed it gently and smiled widely with both eyes locked upon my eyes.

Life is colorful and beautiful (Pic source:

We didn't utter any words but our hearts were both filled with happiness. It was our meeting after some time. He decided to continue his Master degree in Michigan and made a stopover in Singapore for two nights before flying back there again. He booked a honeymoon package room, at a luxurious five-star hotel, complete with the bath tub filled with rose petals, Champagne and fresh strawberries at the side, with a beautiful Singapore city skyline as the direct view from it. He just wanted to make this moments, the rare meeting moments special, just him and myself.

I took a cab right from my office away in the afternoon taking a half-day leave from work and headed to this hotel right away, still in my one-piece black office wear and laptop bag on my right shoulder. He was already there inside the room by the time I knocked onto the hotel's door.

After entering his room, as the door was closed, he removed my bag from my shoulder and hugged me tight to make sure if I was real. We were then kissing long enough to compensate all the moments we had missed out throughout the long distance and years he went away. And next, we made love on that fluffy king size bed with slow music from the radio at the background. Oh, he even prepared Victoria Secret's nighties for me to wear, the transparent sleeveless dark red top with red colour thong as a set. He said he'd been waiting his life to see me wearing it. Haha...

And when it's over, he popped the Moet and Chandon and poured it into the Champagne glasses prepared beforehand by the hotel's staff.

Clink!!! "Cheers dear!" said him and we raised both glasses and felt the bubbles passing through our throats. Aaahhhhh.... it was cold and fresh as it was kept inside the wine bucket filled with many ice cubes. He then led me to the bath tub inside the white marble giant toilet. It was big enough for both of us. The water was lukewarm, just nice for us to sink ourselves in. He asked me to go in first then his turn. He sat right behind me so that I could see the view clearly.

Hmmmm.... the water smelled nice!!! Roses petals covered the tub all over and the sand soap was filled in too to create more bubbles. It was exactly like what I often saw in the romantic movies. Never thought I would experienced it myself with my loved one.

The end of the fairy tales

"Dear.. dear... the food is here. Let's eat!!" his voice was awaken me. I faster got back to where I was. Smiling, I rubbed his palm back, "Thank you. Thank you dear for loving me," told me and smiled. "Don't mention dear. You deserved it. Love you, so much." "Love you too dear, so so much..." The night was then spent with more love making in the hotel room, expressing our loves, never ending love...

Wednesday, March 08, 2017

Moving on

Another page was flipped over. New leaf was empty and clear. No single dot of ink seen on it. It's a closure and at the same time, a new beginning. Of what? Not sure yet. Life went on anyway.

"Don't force what's not yet supposed to fit into your life quote"

"There is always a first time," the quote rang on my head. It was not your fault and no one else's fault. It's just a mix and unmatched. At least I tried.

Old memories was difficult to forget I guessed. The memory and familiarity was stuck underneath the skin, been part of the body, soul, and mind. So I wasn't alone. Others felt the same too. It was only normal.

Follow what your heart was saying..... always... :)

Well, I wouldn't waste any more time. I'd follow what my heart saying and really go into it. Maybe that's where I was meant to be.

So baby hold me close to you right now
I'm only waiting for you to teach me how
To laugh and cry to live and die
In your arms tonight
So baby show me how to laugh and cry

The world around us is moving so fast
We've gotta live love and try to make it last
From this moment the colour is red
And what my heart wants is one road ahead.
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