Remember my post that I'd volunteer to be part of the SLE research? I just did my first appointment during lunch time and it turned out quite well. I collected sample of stool and urines in the office and collected the blood, tears, and sliva samples in the hospital.
I thought I'd stumble upon the tear test, but I survived! Hehe... I felt pricky on my eyes, and that produced really lots of tears. Haha... Maybe those stars did that also so that they could cry during filming. Haha.. While closing my eyes and collecting my tears, the lady asked me the questions for their research. Before going there, I also had to fill up questionnaires. I feel blessed that so far everything has gone well and no big thing happens yet.. Hope it won't come though.. I wish...
Before ending the process, the lady was asking me again if I'm interested to do another research to find out about the relation of SLE with the likelihood of early finding of heart disease for SLE patients.
In other words, she was saying that SLE patient will suffer from heart disease earlier than a normal people. Hehe... I am a bit overwhelmed with all these. I mean, my days of living is shorter than any other people who don't have this disease. That's the fact that I have to accept. How fast? We never know. But at the end of the day, everyone will die, that's the real fact. How soon? We also never know.
It is not necessary that my life will be shorten due to this disease. Other things might happen and not related to this. So, I just tell myself not to think so much. When it comes, it will eventually come. Right now, I just have to focus on the present times, cherish my time with my loved ones, families and friends, especially my Baobei. Recently he follows me in things that I do. E.g. When I used computer, he would sit beside me and started a conversation with me, about his favorite games, about his upcoming Birthday party, while ignoring me who was trying to concentrate on the screen. He would watch Running Man and laughed together with me, and he even talked with me while watching, which disturbed me a little bit. When I arranged my medicine drawers, he sat next to me despite a limited space available, and he would talk with me, asking me what medicines were those, etc. Hehe.. It's a joy of becoming a mother. I have to enjoy it now while I can. When he grows up to teenager, he may not talk as much as he is. He may not sit beside me and talk with me anymore. He may spend his time out of the house playing with his friends, or dating with girlfriend, and so on. Or he might prefer to be quiet and live in his own world :)
I still have many dreams to be realised. I hope I can make it come true... :)
Back to the topic... Yup, a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. I have done my first and 11 more to come. I hope everything will go smoothly. Jia you!!!