Negativity

Power of Negativity (IG: @rimareyka.writes)

If you had known me in person before, you would have recognised me as someone who was positive, optimist, full of energy, that kind of person. To the extent that when someone needed positive energy, they would look for me for accompany, for a talk, a chit chat, a confide session, and so on. 

But recently, I experienced different feeling inside me and it was caused (I felt and I thought) by negative force. It infused its power inside me, without I even realised. 

Change Quotes (Pic source: Google.com)

Things had been hectic for the past 3 weeks as we were short of manpower. However, despite the business, I felt we were still good, as the rest of us knew each other well, worked hand in hand to overcome it. 

But the past one week, it had been different. I thought it was because I did not have enough rest, even after having two days off. Then when back to work, the business was back, and we were working like bees, non-stop handling one order to another. 

In the process, I heard and saw things that I thought was usual. But did not know why, even after having more than enough sleep every day (8 to 8.5 hours each night), I still felt tired and lethargic. No, no, it was not Covid, or any other disease. 

I also felt changes inside me. I became swearing more when customers were asking ridiculous requests (such as ordering fish ball noodle without fish ball, or mushroom soup without mushroom kind of example), or when I accidentally forgot turning on the timer and let my food getting burnt, or when I stupidly almost chopped my own hand, and so on. 

A little thing irritated me. A little gesture and body language made me suspicious, and assumed something bad about the person. 

The smile and laughter was suddenly disappeared. I was no longer in the mood of it. Not even wanted to talk.

When I was away, I was asking myself repeatedly, "What happened? What's going on with me? Why I have become like this?"

Many thoughts appeared. I tried to calm myself down over and over again. Still questioning my self, why? 

That night I shared what I encountered and felt to my hubby. And I realised one thing - I was drawn to not only physically body tired (too much things to do at work), but also the negative force and energy that happened to me (mentally).

The goal is (Pic source: Google.com)

I told him before that I needed to be surrounded by nature, like lying on the sand facing the beach under the trees, or hiking at Macritchie (to be surrounded by tall trees and animals). But unfortunately, I had no energy to do so even when I was given two days off. Moreover the weather was killing recently - scorching hot and/ or continued with a heavy rain. I even had a thought of quitting my job as it had limited my ability to do what I loved doing. 

My hubby advised me to fully rest on my next days off instead of going elsewhere. He said that I needed a good immune system to avoid myself from getting sick (covid and many others), and suggested me to just rest, sleep, watch Korean drama, and so on. 

But with only 2 days off in a week, I had many to-do-list to perform and one of them was to share my negativity experience in this blog. 

I was sleepy and tired as I was writing this. Outside the sky was dark and I could hear the thunder sound giving us warning to keep our clothes hung indoors. Today was definitely not the day to hang around the beach nor forest, and inside my house would be the best place to keep myself safe. I reheated delicious food cooked and sent over by my mom, filling myself with love that was cooked inside those dishes. 

I would meditate in a while and replace the negative force with positive energy (even when it was going to rain heavily!)

I would turn on the calming music and let myself sleep into it. 

When I woke up, (hopefully) the rain would stop, so I could go out meeting my friend, have a chit chat, draw more positive energy from surrounding me, and yeah, I would do my best not to let myself succumb and be defeated by negativity. 

If necessary, I would draw a line, and get rid of anything that made me feeling negative. 

The fact that I realised all sorts of feeling I was experiencing, was actually a kind of meditative, because I was feeling mindful when it happened, and I was aware when it existed. But I would love to be meditative too when it comes to getting rid of it. 

I hoped I would resolve this and not to come into my life any time soon. To be honest, I had nothing to lose. I just did not want to lose myself, yet. 

Cuts and bruises

Please, go away (IG: rimareyka.writes)

 

In our everyday life, it is not always rainbow and butterfly. It is full of ups and downs. Some days it is filled with happiness, but some days, it is simply misery, hurt, deep wounds that you do not intend to reveal, or even share with anyone around you. 

Unlike those visible cuts and wounds that oozes blood, this is kept within, dug, and buried way inside, with a big hope to disappear over time. 

Sometimes if we know someone is experiencing it, we try to talk with him or her, so that it can ease their feelings. But it may not something that the person willing to share. 

In that case, let them feel the grief, let them feel the sorrow. But do not let them fall and succumb to it for a long period of time. 

Distract them with things that make them smile, and even laugh, with other beauty things in life that they may forget temporarily. Show them hope, show them that what they feel is just temporary, because nothing will last, be it good, and bad. 

Just like those wounds I got when I perform my job. What left is just scars, but over time, it will fade and disappear. Just give it time, give it time, and be brave enough to accept the reality and pain that I have to go through. We will all make it. Yeah, I am sure, we will all make it. 

March Muse

March inspiration (Pic source: Google.com)

We do not know when March came, suddenly we are here in the midst of it. Can not believe how we have walked this long, this far, and we are already here. 

Time flies like no body business. We are aging every single day. Some feels weak with their bodies, some feels weak with their memory. Nothing lasts. 

Things change all the time. People come and go in our lives like a dream, be it nightmare or beautiful one.

We are forced by situation sometimes, not intentionally taking things for granted. We feel grateful as much as we can with the blessed good health, good food, and everything else that happens in our lives. 

Not everything we want happens. Sometimes we can choose, but many times, we just cannot and just walk with the flow. 

Day goes one day at a time. Sleeping, waking up, doing our work, eating, resting, going home, and starting it all over again. Every day it happens something like that and varies when it was days off.

We never know what tomorrow like. What number comes up, how high or low or fast the rates change, and it is purely on our luck, whether we will get it or we will not. 

Just leave behind that attachment and expectation, then everything will be alright.

That is life so far. Where it leads to? When changes will happen? It is all question marks. Let nature take its course.

Just remember to always enjoy what you are doing, love your company at all time, your loved ones especially, as there is no guarantee how long more we can meet with each other. And be good, be very good if you can. So, that is for now. Hope thing goes well, I really hope so.

Today I became Aunty...

CNY is coming when... (Pic source: Facebook)

Well, yes, CNY or Chinese New Year is around the corner!!! In less than 10 days, most Singaporean is going to celebrate this big day with their family members. 

Last night I had drink with ST. My hubby joined us after finishing his work. He came panting as he was carrying a carton filled with 30 cans of Coca Cola. Alamak!!!

If 1 can was 320ml, 30 cans would be 9.6 kg. "It is one day offer," he said. "Only $9.95," he continued. And the place we went was just 2 LRT Station away. That was why he did not want to go home first and decided to carry it around.

Our beverage loots for CNY

This morning my hubby asked me to go for breakfast at coffee shop nearby. We had quite a heavy meal (luckily!), before I headed to the shopping mall nearby.

Initially I thought of browsing Uniqlo and buying clothes for CNY. But the shop would only open at 10am. I reached there around 9.20am. So I decided to roam at NTUC, the supermarket where we usually bought our groceries. 

And during this period (before CNY came), they would usually launch "Today Only" promotion, to attract customers to come and buy. 

As I reached the place, I saw people carrying packs of tissue paper. I did not think much though and kept going.

As I went inside, cartons of Pokka green tea stacked up like mountains. A signage was put there, "$4.65/ctn (U.P.$10.80)." Wahhh... what a bargain!!! 

This drink is a must-buy product during CNY because it tastes nice, and the size plus packaging is convenient to be offered to guests when they visit the house.

So other than getting dragon fruits, I carried one carton of the green tea and headed to self-payment cashier.

I carried it back home like carrying a baby in my arms (6 kg was not a joke for walking back home under the hot sun!!!). Hahahaha..  

Reaching home, my mother-in-law saw what I bought and I told her about the offer. She was cursing and swearing as she had already bought it earlier when the price was $6 plus per carton. Hahaha..... It reminded me of my bestie who purchased abalone the other day.

She bought it at $63 for 2 cans, and 3 days later, the price dropped to $28.6 per can (cheaper $2.90/ can or $5.80 for both cans). What to do???? When you thought price had already cheap, the one-day promo offered a much cheaper price than what already been offered previously.

Therefore, you cannot haste in buying as every year, NTUC would use the same strategy, offering "one day" special for their customers. 

Today Only Promotion by NTUC - 23 January 2022

You can check their promotion online by Googling NTUC promotion and click on their "Store Weekly Ads". You would find like shown at the above picture. 

As I saw today's offer, I could not stop myself for becoming Aunty today!!! When I said becoming Aunty, it means, 'Aunty likes to check prices, loves bargain and offer prices, then immediately go to store and shop!!!' Hahahaha.... ^^"

Despite I was just coming back from there under the hot sun, I decided to return back to the store with more purchases. Lol!!! And this time, I got myself well prepared.

A good management skill was required in order to have a smooth shopping experience. Hahahahaha.....

First, I planned what I was going to buy, by looking and analysing the offered price from that slide. Since it was "Today Only", I focused on purchasing only those items offered and required. 

Second, I imagined what to take first as I roughly knew where all the stuffs were usually stored. It means, I planned the route where to go (traffic planning hahahaha....)

Third, since it was going to be a heavy purchase, I did not want to carry it just like how I carried the Pokka green tea earlier. And my 2 hands would not be able to carry so much items. Therefore, I borrowed my mother-in-law's NTUC trolley to shop. Hahahaha....

Fourth, immediately went out from home despite a hot sun outside as it was better to shop early as many people would come later after lunch. Went early was recommended too to prevent items to be out-of-stock.

Fifth, planning how to go through payment without having to queue so long. The self-payment counter would be the faster option for payment but they only allowed a single basket items, as they only had limited space for the paid items to be put. Not forgetting to use my HPB or Health Promotion Board healthpoints reward voucher that I earned from sleeping above 7 hours per day.

My loots from Today Only offer from NTUC

Considering all the factors above, I managed to shop the above in 20-minutes time (from picking until paying). Plus another 20 minutes from and to home journey. Hahahaha..... 

CNY preparation

With 2 sets of promotion tissue paper and the above items inside the basket, I spent a little over $50 (after deducting the $10 HPB voucher). What a satisfying shopping experience!!! And this time, I did not have to carry anything, only pushing the trolley back home!!! Yay yay!!!!

Today is the day...

Wherever and whatever you wanna be (IG: rimareyka.writes)

It is one of the days that many people might have been dreaming of... Where I sit at the bench, in the middle of the busy town, the CBD (Central Business District) area, in one of the costliest countries in the world. 

Instead of getting myself busy like the rest of the honey bees, I am sitting down here sipping my Iced Coffee (bought from local business shop - actually my colleague's shop).

Dressing casually, I am sitting with legs akimbo, occasionally lift down my mask, so that I can sip my coffee. 

Support local business (IG: localcoffeepeople)

Today the weather is really nice. It is a sunny day, but the wind blow constantly messing my hair, from time to time blocking my sight from typing this blog from the convenience of my mobile phone. 

It is one of the me-alone times, among many others. It is almost 12pm. I see more and more people walking in a group - at least in two - discussing what to eat for lunch, or talking about what happened in their working place earlier, or otherwise, their personal lives' matters. 

They are dressing smartly, with the shoes polished shiningly. Hair combed with gel or sprayed and looked tough. Ladies are walking with high heel, with the working pass card hung onto their neck. It is not as crowded as before (before Covid-19), but still, the crowd is slowly back (with 50% of the manpower is allowed to be back to work at the working place).

For them, time is money. For me, time is something I am splurging with right now, as there is no limit, as I have nothing planned inside my head. I just want to be, be here, enjoying my solitary within the busy life that many people have. 

Because it is time for me to rest now. So I am here focusing myself to just be, be here, be alone, be mindful, breath, write, express everything I feel right now. 

No one bothers me too. They walk and treat me as transparent, as if they do not see me, as if I do not exist here. It feels good, really!!! 

Some people came and went sitting at the empty seats beside me. But all was only sitting for a while. No one sit as long as I do, because they have things to do, they have agenda in their day.

Have you ever done thing like this before? Have you ever had the luxury to do this kind of thing before? To do nothing, and not to worry about anything else. 

Because I believe in one thing, that there is always time for every thing. 

There is always time for everything (IG: rimareyka.writes)

And everything happens for a good reason!!! Try it sometimes and you will feel better.