Dream

Explore. Dream. Discover

"May all your wishes and dreams come true".

This sentence would appear on the usual Birthday greetings and sometimes in the beginning of the new year. 

D R E A M

What is your dream?

I am sure that everyone has a dream. Be it a big dream or a small dream.

I dream to study abroad. I dream to become a superstar. I dream to be rich. I dream to join marathon. And so on...

Everyone's dream is different. Some may be same. 

Some people's dreams came true early. Some will take time. Some even takes much longer time, or even forever...

But do not disheartened. Because everyone's journey is different.

Do not compare. Do not get jealous. Do not envy. 

Just focus in achieving yours.

My dream is to see the world with my own two (or maybe four) eyes.

I started it since I was eleven, and hopefully it will take forever to keep my dreams to be fulfilled.

One place at a time. 

One country at a time.

One season at a time.

I am in no rush in achieving it, but try to realize it while still alive, healthy, and enough money to afford it.

I am enjoying in the companionship of the journey itself. Sometimes alone. Sometimes with a friend or a group of friends. Sometimes with a family or a group of families. And sometimes even with a group of strangers.

It is the time where I can be myself more. Testing more of capabilities, my patience, my instinct of survival, my adaptability facing any situation, and more. At the same time, I just want to relax and enjoy the nature surrounding me.

Time ticks like a bomb. Every day we get older. Our time to live gets lesser and lesser. 

Health also deteriorates over time. And most importantly, the world gets lesser peace these days. War happens. Natural disasters also happen every where. Many jobs are cut due to AI.

The more we need to focus and cling to our dreams to fulfill before it is all becoming impossible.

And of course, we need to pray more, so that we can be protected along the way, and blessed with good health.

That is a glimpse of my dream.

What about yours? 

Growing older, growing wiser

Overcome life (Pic source: Google.com)

As we get older, we should have experienced things that younger people not experienced before. We have seen more things surrounding us, experienced more events not only internally, but also externally (worldwide affairs). 

We have met, known and lost more people throughout that journey of life. 

Our mind should have grown and aim to be a better person than we used to too, not the other way around. 

By middle age, we should aim to have been wiser, knowing what is right and wrong. 

Letting go have become easier, especially the wrong people, toxic relationship / friendship, mistakes we made in life, etc.

From the dictionary:

Wise - (adj.) having the power of discerning and judging properly as to what is true or right

Wiser - (adj.) having or showing understanding and good judgment: having or showing deep knowledge or learning. 

As you grow older... (Pic source: Google.com)

I happened to read the article from quotesilove.com and below is what they posted about growing older. It is meaningful and let me share it with you in this blog:

1. Age may bring physical ailments, but it also brings emotional resilience. You learn to face adversity with grace and strength, knowing that you have the wisdom and experience to overcome any obstacle.

2. As you get older, you learn to let go of things that no longer serve you. You start to prioritize what is important and focus on what brings you happiness.

3. Age may slow you down physically, but it can also sharpen your mind and deepen your understanding of the world. You become more insightful and compassionate, and your wisdom becomes a beacon of hope for those around you.

4. Growing older is a journey of self-discovery. It is about finding your true purpose in life and living it to the fullest.

5. Life is a journey, and each year brings new lessons to be learned. Embrace the journey, take risks, and always keep an open mind.

6. Growing older means gaining the confidence and courage to speak your truth and stand up for what you believe in.

7. Age is merely a number. What truly matters is the knowledge and wisdom you accumulate along the way. Embrace your experiences and let them guide you towards a life well-lived.

8. Growing older is a gift. It is an opportunity to learn from our mistakes, to grow, and to become a better version of ourselves.

9. Life is a journey, and each passing year brings with it a new chapter. Embrace the unknown, welcome change, and always strive to learn and grow.

10. With age comes the courage to be yourself. You stop caring about what others think and embrace your uniqueness. Your authenticity becomes your greatest strength.

11. As you grow older, you become more aware of your mortality. But rather than fearing it, you embrace it and live life to the fullest. You know that every day is a gift, and you do not want to waste it.

12. Age is just a number, but wisdom is timeless. Embrace the knowledge and experience that comes with each passing year.

13. Age is just a number, but wisdom is priceless. It helps us to make better decisions, has deeper relationships, and live a more fulfilling life.

14. Growing older is like a fine wine; you become more refined, sophisticated, and complex. Your experiences and knowledge add depth to your character, making you more interesting and engaging.

15. Wisdom is not something that can be taught; it is earned through life experiences. As you grow older, you gain more of it, and you become a valuable source of advice and guidance for those around you.

16. With age comes the realization that life is too short to waste on trivial things. You learn to prioritize what is important and live a more meaningful and purposeful life.

17. The best thing about getting older is the wisdom that comes with it. You start to see the world in a whole new light.

18. Every year is a new opportunity to reinvent yourself and become the best version of yourself yet.

19. Growing older is a privilege denied to many. Cherish every moment and make the most of your time on this earth.

20. Age may bring physical changes, but it also brings emotional growth. You become more self-aware.

Wise quote (Pic source: Google.com)

21. The wisdom of age teaches us that true beauty comes from within. It’s about being kind, compassionate, and loving towards yourself and others.

22. Growing older is a privilege denied to many. Take the time to appreciate each year, celebrate your successes, and never forget the lessons you have learned along the way.

23. Life is a journey, and each year is a new chapter. Write your story with courage, passion, and purpose.

24. Age is just a number, but attitude is everything. Keep a positive outlook on life and you will never feel old.

25. Growing older is not about slowing down but about continuing to live life to the fullest. Embrace your passions, try new things, and never lose your sense of wonder.

26. Age is not a measure of success; it is a reflection of your journey. You may not have achieved everything you wanted, but you have gained invaluable lessons along the way that will serve you for a lifetime.

27. Age is not a barrier to new experiences; it is an invitation to explore the world in new ways. You have the wisdom to appreciate the beauty around you and the courage to try new things.

28. As you grow older, you begin to realize that the most valuable currency you possess is time. Spend it wisely, invest it in experiences that matter, and cherish every moment.

29. With age comes a deeper appreciation for the simple things in life. Take time to savour the moment, enjoy the small pleasures, and find joy in the everyday.

30. The secret to growing older gracefully is to embrace the changes that come with age and to never stop learning, growing, and evolving.

31. As you age, you realize that the most important things in life are not material possessions but the people you love, the memories you create, and the impact you have on the world.

32. Aging gracefully means accepting your imperfections and embracing your unique beauty.

33. Age is not a barrier to success but a testament to experience. Use your wisdom and knowledge to achieve greatness and to inspire those around you.

34. Age is an opportunity to try new things and explore new passions. Do not be afraid to take risks and step outside your comfort zone.

35. Age is an opportunity to reflect on the lessons you have learned, the experiences you have had, and the people who have touched your life. Take the time to honour your journey, and celebrate the wisdom you have gained along the way.

36. You are never too old to set new goals and achieve your dreams. Every day is a new opportunity to make your life exactly what you want it to be.

37. As you grow older, you start to appreciate the beauty of imperfection. You understand that flaws make us human and that embracing them is the key to true self-love and acceptance.

38. As you grow older, you become more empathetic and compassionate. You understand the struggles of others and are better equipped to offer support and guidance.

39. Age is not just a number; it’s a reflection of the experiences, wisdom, and lessons you’ve gained over time. Every wrinkle tells a story, and every grey hair is a badge of honour.

40. The beauty of ageing is that you become more comfortable in your own skin. You start to realize that your imperfections make you unique and beautiful.

As you grow older... (Pic source: Google.com)

41. Growing older is not about losing your youth; it is about gaining wisdom, self-awareness, and inner peace. You learn to let go of the things that no longer serve you and focus on what truly matters.

42. Growing older is a journey, not a destination. Enjoy the ride and make the most of every moment.

43. Growing older is not a curse but a gift. Use this gift to live the life you have always dreamed of, and to inspire others to do the same.

44. Growing older can be tough, but it also comes with a newfound appreciation for life’s simple pleasures.

45. Life is too short to waste time worrying about getting older. Embrace each new year as a chance to grow and learn.

46. As you age, you realize that life is a precious gift. You start to appreciate the small things that bring joy and meaning to your life.

47. Age is just a number, but wisdom is a gift that only comes with time. Embrace your experiences, learn from your mistakes, and share your wisdom with the world.

48. As you age, you start to realize that the things you once thought were problems were actually blessings in disguise.

49. Growing older is like a treasure hunt; each day brings new discoveries and insights. You become more curious and adventurous, and your thirst for knowledge never fades.

50. Growing older means gaining a deeper appreciation for the people and things that truly matter in life.

51. Age is not a limitation; it is an opportunity to learn, grow and evolve. With each passing year, you become more resilient, adaptable and wiser.

52. Life is too short of taking yourself too seriously. Laugh often, and do not be afraid to be silly.

53. Growing older is a privilege, but it is also a responsibility to leave the world a better place than you found it.

54. Wisdom is not just a product of age but a result of experience. Embrace each new challenge as an opportunity to learn, grow, and become wiser.

55. You may be getting older, but that doesn’t mean you have to act your age. Stay young at heart and enjoy every moment to the fullest.

56. Growing older does not have to mean growing bored. Life is full of adventures waiting to be had, no matter your age.

57. Aging gracefully means embracing the changes that come with time and finding beauty in every stage of life.

58. Growing older means embracing your quirks and flaws and learning to love yourself just the way you are.

59. You may be getting older, but that does not mean you have to slow down. Keep pushing yourself to new heights and accomplishing your goals.

60. You are never too old to learn something new. Keep your mind open and your curiosity alive.

61. As you grow older, you begin to realize that time is your most precious resource. Use it wisely, live in the moment, and make every day count.

62. Aging gracefully means finding joy in the small moments and celebrating life’s milestones with those you love.

63. Do not let anyone tell you that you are too old to do something. If you have the passion and the drive, there is nothing you can not accomplish.

64. Growing older is like climbing a mountain. It may be tough at times, but the view from the top is always worth it.

Life starts in the middle age (Pic source: Google.com)

65. Age may bring physical limitations, but it also brings mental clarity and emotional stability. You learn to control your thoughts and emotions, and this newfound wisdom brings peace and tranquility.

66. Growing older is like a beautiful tapestry; each thread represents a different experience, and together they create a masterpiece. You become a walking work of art, full of depth and richness.

67. Growing older is like climbing a mountain. It may be challenging at times, but the view from the top is worth it. You gain a new perspective on life and appreciate the journey more.

68. As you age, you start to realize that the things that once seemed important are not as important as you thought. Focus on what truly matters in life.

69. Life is a journey, and with each passing year, you gain valuable experience and wisdom. You may not have all the answers, but you have a better understanding of what truly matters in life.

70. As you age, you realize that time is precious. You start to value each moment and make the most of the time you have left.

71. With age comes wisdom, and wisdom teaches us to live in the moment. It helps us to appreciate the beauty around us and to find joy in the simple things.

72. Aging gracefully means finding a balance between taking care of yourself and enjoying life to the fullest.

By now, you have probably learned that aging is not just about getting old, but it is also about gaining wisdom, experiences, and living a fulfilling life.

So go ahead, take that trip you have been putting off, try that new hobby, and make the most out of every moment.

You are never too old to set new goals and achieve them. Keep learning, keep growing, and keep inspiring those around you with your wisdom and experience.

Enjoy the second phase of the journey of your life, more confidently and with much positive spirit with you! You can do this! 

Peace and gratitude

Peaceful life is something that you cannot take for granted. 

In a chaos world like now, it is something that priceless and not everyone is lucky enough to have it, even when you are living in a peaceful country. 

People are busy searching for a better life by working more, earning more, investing more and have no time to have a peaceful mind or restful body. 

Even when they are having more than enough, they still aim for more without realising by having less, you do not have to worry of losing what you have in case of leaving the world behind, moving out to other countries,  and so on. 

With the availability of social media, people also compete more - "I must have things that are trending now", "I must eat at that café or restaurant that are popular now", "I must show them a more expensive thing than what they are having", etc.

Well, it is up to individual what life they want to have. 

But having a peaceful mind, living in peaceful country, leading a peaceful life by living simply, is also a choice that human can choose to have. 

A simple cup of tea or coffee, a simple room or house to live, a simple cloth to wear, a simple food to eat can be a wonderful life to live in too, but not many would understand and willing to choose. 

Many are simply comparing what they have with what other people have, and therefore, in a blink of eye, that simple happiness has just disappeared. 

Gratitude is the key to treasure what we have. Count your blessings every single day starting from the time you open your eyes from your sleep at night - "thank you for the good sleep", "thank you for another day to live", "thank you for the roof on top of my head, the bed I sleep in, the peaceful morning, the clean water to take bath, to drink, the family and friends surrounding me, the job that I hold on, the salary I receive, the superior that teaches me everything by asking me to do lots of things", and so many more.

Just having the thought of it, it could even make you smile. 

And simple resolution each day, "hope today I can do at least one good or kind thing that can bring happiness to others".

You do not have to go up to the mountain, or to be at seaside, or inside the forest to feel peaceful and happy. It can be at any where and any time, although those places give a plus point, especially when things in life are rough, emotions are jumbled up and your mind would not stop thinking.

It is not easy being a human. Buddha already said that we are born to suffer from the moment we born until the time we die. But let us take it slowly and choose an easier way to live, and love ourselves more. It is not selfish. But if we cannot love ourselves, how can we love others. Only when we are full of love within ourselves, then we are capable in loving others. 

So remember, give yourself peace and happiness. It is better than busy aiming on something that only lead to nowhere but suffering. 

May all sentient being be happy and healthy,

free from suffering and the cause of suffering,

life full of peace and joy. 

Sadhu Sadhu Sadhu

Women in Mid 40s

Menopause (Pic source: Google.com)

Hey hi, how have you been?

It has been a while since the last time I posted here. Time flies like crazy. In few more years, I would enter the middle age that I never thought I would be one day. Hahaha...

Talking about this, I want to share what I have been through while passing these years. I would not shy sharing all these because one day, all young ladies (readers) would also one day reach this phase, if you are lucky enough, of course! :D

I wanted to share my menopause experience here. I have it already now. It considered quite early but still under normal age category. I had the pre-menopause moments for about two years before the period had actually stopped.

The most obvious symptoms was irregular periods. In the beginning, the period duration became shorten where usually it took 4-5 days each, had become 2-3 days. The flow had also reduced. 

Slowly, the frequency had also lessen  From the regular once a month, it had reduced to once every 2 months, 3 months, and even it stopped for almost a year. 

The other symptom that appeared was hot flush - a sudden feeling of warmth in the upper body. In my case, it was happened mostly at the back upper part, below the neck area. 

I heard about it before, but when I experienced it myself, it still felt weird and funny :D 

Brain fog and forgetfulness. You know, it was when you went somewhere like kitchen, room, toilet, etc., and then suddenly you could not remember what you were going to do by entering those places. Or when in your mind you could picture one thing but suddenly you could not remember "that particular word" of that thing. Or you just lost focus and harder to concentrate.

Well, we thought it was because it was parts of getting older, but apparently, that was symptoms from pre-menopause as well.

Some people would be having difficulty to sleep. Not to the stage of insomnia, but it was not as easy to sleep as before. Luckily so far I have no such thing unless I had a very high dose of caffeine after lunch time or took a nap in the afternoon. And I had to practice a simple mediation before slowly dosing off to the dreamland.

The infamous thing from perimenopause is mood change, which includes easy to get irritation, sometimes could feel depressed too as our hormones changed. Especially when you were alone. 

When I told the doctor that I had my menopause already, one thing she asked me if I did any additional measure in taking care of my bones. The lack of ovarian estrogen after menopause could cause a significant loss in bone strength, placing women at higher risk of osteoporosis. Therefore, I needed enough dose of Calcium and vitamin D taken into a daily basis. As I could not be exposed into the sunlight, I had to take vitamin D supplement into my diet.

I was also advised to do light exercise as not to exert the joint parts too much. So instead of running, I could do walking on a daily basis and light aerobic or Zumba few times in a week.

Food was also playing a big part to lead a healthier lifestyle. You could observe what you get in your basket each time you buy your weekly shopping. 

I just shared with my sister-in-law recently on how lucky we are for staying in Singapore as the Singapore government really takes care of its citizens by always encouraging us to take healthier food (less salt, less sugar, less oil campaign), do at least 150 mins exercise a week by providing us free exercises that we could book through the Healthy 365 apps, providing exercise places, grounds and parks accessible in each neighborhood housings for free or with lesser/ subsidized fees, free checkup for men and women above 40s, sometimes free in-body check up (to check how much muscles are in our body parts) and providing us advises on how to improve them - by exercising and taking more proteins in our food, and many more.

The high cost of hospital bill has also become the deterrent for us to prevent sickness and improve our health being.

I mean, how many countries in the world would bother to care to its citizens health like that? 

Maintain the moderate BMI is still difficult for me, so far, I have always fallen in borderline overweight category. But I tried my best to balance my meals and eat more healthier food. 

Most importantly, keep positive mind everyday. It is not easy, but we can do it. Especially morning time. It is the most important time of the day to have a positive mind. 

Getting old is part of process of living as a human being. We have to accept it that nothing stays permanent. Wrinkles, white hair, loosen cheeks and eye bags, slow metabolism, weaken joints and bones are something we need to face soon or later. 

We cannot avoid it all (unless you go for face-lifting surgery, or Botox, of course). But by growing old, we can focus on how we could grow wiser, calm in time of crisis, and maintain peace in mind despite whatever thing that happen worldwide - high oil and gold prices, wars, natural disaster, economic crisis, and so on. Also spend our money and time wisely in everyday life.

There are more and more people in their 60s, 70s and 80s in Singapore these days. Soon, I too will be there. Hope everything will be in smooth journey and most importantly blessed with good health so I still can travel and visit more countries in the world and do what I love doing.

So, one day at one time. Focus on what is there at the present moment. Just get ready of what will come ahead. Cheers and wish everyone be happy and healthy always..... :)

Receiving Day

Source: tranquilitydujour

I have been wanting to post this on my blog, so let me post it today. All of you must be wondering what the title means. Hahaha... :D

It is simple though. Receiving day is the day when I receive things from people. What things?

Well, it can be many things, a gift from the heart. And usually I receive it from my friends or families, from here (Singapore) or outside Singapore (overseas).

It is just so coincidence that on that particular day, more than one people give me the things, as if all of them have agreed in advance to send me something on the same day.

It happened so many times and it often brings me wonder :)

I am very lucky and feel very grateful for many of very close and good friends (wherever they are, many are staying overseas). But at times, I feel a bit lonely, as I do not have many friends as I was not born and grow up here in Singapore (luckily my dear hubby always reminds me that good quality friends are better than quantity).

Those who stay faraway, I am very lucky to have friends who are equally grateful for having each other and treasure our friendship. We always have each other in our thought. Despite long distance, we often keep in touch through chatting apps and messengers. 

And whenever someone - friends, colleagues, friend's friend, relatives, family members - are coming over to Singapore and vice versa, we would send something to each other, and usually it is something from our own country, or something that the other party will love to have.

But the thought itself, has already been a blessing for me. Many of them treat me even like a family. I am very very grateful and thankful, to you know who you are, in case you read this :) 

Thank you for everyone's love. Love you all ❤️ 

And yes, that receiving day, really make my heart fill with so many gratitude, for everything in life. Then I would feel, at least I am not lonely. Someone else think of me. And I hope that all of them is blessed with good health and lots of happiness in their lives, and wish that we could meet each other again in person :)

Do you also often have receiving day in your life too?? :)))

Travelling

Courtesy of: Travel Thoughts PH

 

I first traveled out of my home country at the age of 11. I was very lucky indeed being to travel in such a young age, not only to one, but 3 countries (Hong Kong, Taiwan, and Japan) and transit in Singapore (first time touching my feet there). But before that, I had been travelling all around the islands where I lived in car with my parents and siblings, and domestic plane or even boat to my father's hometown.

Then I studied overseas as young as eighteen and to further country when I was twenty. While on school holiday, I traveled mostly by trains to other cities and neighboring countries. Sometimes, it took me three flights and trip more than 24 hours to reach the other side of the world, to cut cost (the more you transits, the cheaper your flight is).

Since my late 20s, after diagnosed with SLE, I started to travel to countries I wanted to visit. First on the list, was Tibet. But sometimes, fate led me to countries I even had never heard before - so many of them - thanks to my parents who led me visiting them as they brought me along as their company. Countries like Bhutan and Nepal, Iceland, Baltic countries (Denmark, Norway, Sweden, Finland, Estonia), Russia, and so on.

Fate brought me to explore India. My dream to meet Dalai Lama has not come true yet. It has been years since my failed attempt, and until now, I still have not made them realized yet. But the company had brought me to Buddha pilgrimage places - I had been dreamed visiting them since my middle school time. Not only that. I also managed to explore Sikkim, including Gangtok, Darjeeling, Kalimpong, and visited many Tibetan temples.

Through good friend, I managed to visit Sri Lanka (never ever thought visiting the country before), Vietnam, Thailand (the Golden Triangle), Myanmar, West America (LA, Las Vegas, SF). Later on, I managed to make my dream came true by visiting UK, Central Europe (Hungary, Slovakia, Czech), back to my school in Switzerland, and second visit to Denmark and Sweden.

Later on, I started touring with group tour to places that were more convenient to go with the tour group, such as: Balkan countries (Croatia, Bosnia and Herzegovina, Montenegro and Slovenia, plus Venice in Italy), Mongolia, Central Asia - the five -Tans (Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Uzbekistan, Turkmenistan, and Tajikistan), and recently to the East America and Canada.

I never count how many countries I ever visited but I think it should have been more than 50 countries. And it does not stop here. As long as my feet, body, mind, leave, and wallet allows, I will still travel and explore to visit other parts of the world. 

The job has made the travel slow, but it allows me to earn and save the money to travel. With the mercy of my Boss, it allowed me to spend time with family too apart from days taken for traveling. 

There are still a lot of country I have not visited yet. But I hope, one day, I will able to visit all of them, one at a time, slowly, but sure :D

Talking with stranger

We're just strangers with some memories

Many people do not like to talk with the stranger. Especially these days, when scammers are everywhere trying to empty your bank account.

Let me share you about my story. 

I am an introvert. But since I often go out alone, travel alone, eat alone, shop alone, even often work alone, I realize that I have been talking more often to strangers these days. Sometime I even find it myself bizarre why I was doing it. Hahaha... :D

Well, let me share with you some of the occasions on why I talked with them.

My hubby works even on weekend. So I usually spend one of the weekend alone. One day I cycled to the newly opened hawker center in my neighborhood area. It was my first time visiting it and not knowing on what to eat. I ordered food based on my craving plus teh tarik, and managed to get a two-seat table in that crowded place.

I was sitting alone. But since the place was really crowded, one lady asked if she could sit on the empty seat next to me. I said, "sure!" almost immediately. Because, why not? 

She was wearing apron and carrying lunch box plus water bottle filled with various Chinese herbs. Just by seeing her, I knew that she must be one of the staffs working there, going to have her lunch break.

Well, I am an observant freak. Hahaha... :P I often observe people in my quietness. I also like to read people's body language.

At first she took her mobile phone, scrolling, listening and sending voice message. It is very common to see people having their meal and focusing their eyes on mobile phone, as a sign that they do not want to be disturbed, which I do myself occasionally too. 

Then soon after, she kept her phone into her pocket and started focusing on the steamed brown color bun, which was filled with vegetable, ham and egg in the middle, some kind of Chinese burger, but I was 100% sure that it was not sold anywhere in Singapore, which means, it was handmade.

I saw her eating and her minds seemed just occupied with some little thought but nothing serious or big in particular. Her eyes were blank and looking at afar, seemed not to any particular thing. 

Then I guessed, it would be no harm to make a small talk with her, just to let her forget about her daily chores for a while, and answer them just as herself truly.

So I started the conversation by asking if she was working in one of the stalls here.

By appearance, she looked older than me (like in her 50s, with ahjumma style hair and dressing, a bit plump, and not too old). She was a bit surprised that stranger asked her questions, but soon, I could feel she became feeling relaxed and responsive well to my questions. Especially when we came from a similar background.

We both were coming not from Singapore, but have stayed for many years and settled down here. We were married with one kid. 

From our conversation, I managed to know where she lived (not in detail, of course), when she started moving house in this area, how old was her son, which school he studied, which year, what major, what he liked doing at home, at what age he came to Singapore, whom she married with, where she worked (current and previous job), how long, what she did, nationalities of the current bosses, etc.

It was raining so I did not have to rush as I needed the rain to stop before I continued cycling, while  her lunch break would take around 45 minutes to an hour. 

The person looked approachable and I wanted to know how they felt (at that point of time) about their lives here in Singapore.

I mean, Singapore is such a small country but so many people have come here, to study, to work, to get married, to retire, and so on. There is no harm in finding out about other people's lives, not having particular reason in it. Just out of my curiosity.

Stranger talks :D

Another time I chatted with stranger was when I was queuing to check in for my flight. This time, a young Chinese lady, a student, who was having a short holiday, wanted to continue her vacation in Hong Kong. 

We were chatting high and low, up and down. She was so eager in sharing about her life. She studied in Beijing and I told her I used to study there too. When she asked me when, I told her that it was almost two decades ago.

She was shocked!!! She thought I was in her age from the way I dressed, talked, laughed. And when I told her my son was in 20s, she was even surprised!!! Hahahaha.... she must be shocked that all that while, she was talking with ahjumma, and not a young student like her :D Lucky for her that by then, we had reached to the check-in counter. After that, we both went to our way separately. :D

Since I work only with my Boss, I often go for lunch by myself. And I found out that I would chat with a stranger who share the table with me. Sometimes, I asked them how much they paid for the food that they purchased. Sometimes, I asked whether their food nice or not, whether it was worth buying or not. 

Sometimes, when queuing for the food, when there was a 1-for-1 promotion, I even shared the promotion with the stranger who was standing behind me. First, I checked with her first if she wanted to buy 1 or 2. When she said 1, then I would ask if she wanted to share the 1-for-1 promotion with me and we shared the cost. Since it was half price, of course she said yes.

Later on, after she paid be through Paynow, I would be able to see the name. When the name seemed like Indonesian name, I would ask if she was from there and more chat would continue until we both received our order and leave in separate way.

Quote by Aristotle ("Man is a social animal.")

When I was travelling alone in Shanghai, I went to the Shanghai restaurant selling the famous Michelin Xiao Long Bao shop. There were few dishes I wanted to try. But if I ordered too many, for sure I could not finish them. I ordered two dishes and took my seat. 

After ordering, one lady who queue behind me, came to the same direction towards my table. Since she was alone, I offered her to share the table with me.

Then we started to talk. I mean, I started the conversation. Hahaha... 

From there, I knew that she was Japanese, coming to Shanghai for short holiday, and travelled alone, just like me. We talked until our food came. She only ordered 1 basket of xiao long bao. So, since I ordered two dishes and could not finish, I asked her if she wanted to share my dumpling soup. 

She must have read the food review before coming too and was willing to try. So, it was great. We could share more dishes and not let the food wasted.

There were more occasions talking with stranger. When travelling, I liked talking with the Grab driver (especially on the long journey). Most of them were local and knew the country really well. That was why many Singaporean taxi driver was famous for being chatty while driving their passengers (although many were complaining about the government :D).

I talked to stranger while shopping at supermarket too. While picking fruits, choosing vegetables, and so on. Sometimes I could get one tip or two on how to choose a good quality of food. Which or where to buy, and so on.

Talking to stranger. They were not necessarily becoming a friend, but it could fill some part of your time and share your life with others, so they not becoming lonely or feeling alone. 

It does not mean I become a busybody or kaypoh too. Because for me, it was all just a 'hi' and 'bye' thing, a passing through moments that became memories in seconds. A reminder for myself, that I was not alone. Who knows what you do might help the other party one day.

Anyway, just wanted to share this bits and parts of my life with you here. If you also have an experience talking with stranger like me, and love doing it, you can share it in the comment here as well.

L I F E

Keep going!!! (Pic source: Google.com)

Recently I watched the Korean drama titled 'The Haunted Palace'. One of the character was Gang Cheol, the ancient serpent spirit (Imoogi) that fell into the earth and after more than hundred years later, he inserted his spirit inside the human body that had just passed away. 

Only after he entered into the human body, he then could feel the five senses that we human have, such as: taste, smell, hear, touch, and see. When he was living as the dragon spirit, he did not feel these five senses so in the drama, he seemed overreacting when he first time tasted the plain porridge as a human being. His mind was jumping around, and so happy with it. He was even craving to taste more food that human usually has, and his favorite was the traditional Korean confectionary (hangwa), which also included the pumpkin taffy (yeot).

Then slowly, his other senses like see and touch, made his heart beating so fast, which then he realized that he had fallen in love with Yeo-Ri, whose body he needed in order for him to ascend to the Heaven. This feeling struck him in awe and he often cursed the human who felt all these senses. Because of it, many times human did something wrong (like enjoying being drunk and eating too much which caused harm to the body or sickness, killing people out of greed or jealousy, raping, and so on).

With only these scenes, it struck me as well because as a human being, these five senses have been part of our way of living and I could imagine how Gang Cheol felt. It was like, being a human but having those senses separated from the body. He did not think much about sadness, happiness, and so on because he lived with different purposes in life and being focus with it.  

Do what you can :) (Pic source: Google.com)

As someone who has lived more than forty years, sometimes I would have wondered how I had lived in the past. Moments, memories, emotions, all of it came and went like a jigsaw puzzle, flying around in corner of my brain. Hardship, sadness, anger, feeling constraint, wild dreams, jealousy, wonder, happiness, freedom, boredom, joyful, curiosity, motivated, dejected, disappointed, resentful, amused, empowered, revenge, and so on. 

Every decision, every move, every action, every plan, was all made at those moments of living, which had now become memories, good and bad. Regrets were there too. But all of those had built the person inside me. 

Sometimes, I wondered, how was me in the previous life, or who was I before becoming a human in this life? All the people I had met, what were our relations in the past? Of course, it did not really matter. What mattered was how we met and interacted again at this present lives. 

But now, growing up, this process of looking back, had told me one thing - if you only realized, everything was related with those senses, those feelings, those emotions. If only we could tell ourselves that it was nothing more than that, if only we could stop these emotions from appearing in our heart (those that I mentioned earlier), if we could delete our feelings just like imagining ourselves to erase those emotions with eraser from our heart and made it blank, feeling nothing anymore, then we human, should not have problems in life anymore. Should we?

But of course, it was easier to say and done. Things that had to happen to us (resulting from our past and present karma), still had to happen. And only by experiencing it ourselves, or learning the mistakes from others, then we could decide if we want to pursue the matter still or avoid it or let it go.

Only when it happened to us, then we could understand how people felt when it happened to them. Anxiety, feeling depressed, isolation, and so on. If we could avoid it, then it was good. But if not, do not give up. It was not the end of the world. 

I mean, every human being carried different life's journey. Fate, luck, love happened differently to everyone. Not even twin carried the same life and fate. 

Be kind as you can (Pic source: Google.com)

Our realization to be a better human being is important. And try to strive our best to bring happiness to others. If can not, at least be the eraser to remove their sadness. Be there for them, listen to their feelings and thought, are more than enough. 

Also, take good care of our health from now. It is never too late to start. Eat healthily, drink responsibly, exercise regularly, listen to motivational talk, read self-help book, walk with natural surrounding, see sunrise and sunset, and so on. 

I wish everyone of you a wonderful day, life full of gratitude of what you have, blessed with good health - both physically and mentally, and have positive mind and attitude towards life ahead!!! Take care and talk to you again! :)

Places to eat in Shanghai :)

Below are some of the good food to eat in Shanghai, if you happen have a chance to visit Shanghai one day :)

Shanghai food:

 1. Lai Lai Xiao Long - 莱莱小笼 (Michelin)

Lailai Xiao Long - Must eat the crab and meat xiao long bao :)

Address: Huangpu, Tianjin Road No.504

Recommended food: crab and meat xiao long bao (soup dumpling) 8 pcs/basket - CNY46, ginger with vinegar (to enhance the depth of the xiao long bao flavor - CNY1 per small plate), fried pork cutlet - CNY25, crab and shrimp Wonton soup 8 pcs/bowl - CNY55. 

Open 8am-9.30pm. I was second in queue around 7.40am. Before, there was nobody. But once the queue was formed, it was getting longer, longer, and longer. You need to come early (slightly around or before 7.30am) to avoid longer waiting time. 

2. Xiao Shao Xing - 小绍兴

Xiao Shao Xing - Sliced boiled chicken or baizhanji :)

Address: Huangpu, Yunnan South Rd No. 69

Recommended food: sliced boiled cold chicken or baizhanji - CNY55 per500g or CNY77 for half chicken, scallion oil noodle - CNY8/bowl, and chicken congee - CNY3. 

The chicken dish may look simple but it is prepared with superior quality compared to ordinary poultry. It is served with dipping sauce.

It is a traditional brand food street shop (government owned) and has been there for a long time. If you prefer something to eat that is simpler and healthier, this is the place to go. My local Shanghai friend brought me here. It was perfect to have it with Qingdao beer :D

3. Da Hu Chun - 大壶春

Address: Huangpu, 11 Sichuan Rd (South) and many other branches.

Recommended food: pan fried pork buns - CNY11 for 4 pcs or small pans one - CNY39 for 10 pcs.

4. Xiao Yang's Sheng Jian or pan fried bun - 小杨生煎

Address: Hongyi Plaza 299 Nanjing Rd E or 178 Ningbo Rd and many other branches.

Recommended food: Xiao Yang pan fried pork buns - CNY13 for 4 pcs. If you want to try more choices, you can choose the 3 flavor in 1 plate (pork meat, prawn mala, and vegetables) - CNY24.50 for 6pcs. 

Personally, I like both the pork bun and prawn mala fillings. It is very juicy and tasty. Bite a little hole on the soft part of the skin, and slurp the juice before biting the big flesh, otherwise you will burst the whole juice out and become a waste :D I did not have a chance to visit Da Hu Chun and managed to try the 3 flavor pan fried bun here at Xiao Yang. It was good. You can add some sauce and chili oil provided by the restaurant.

Xiao Yang's and Xiesanbao combo - Must eat both :)

5. Xie San Bao - 蟹叁宝上海 

Address: Huangpu, Tianjin Road No.513 and many other branches

Recommended food: crab roe noodle, crab roe rice, crab roe porridge. I paid CNY103 for takeaway the crab roe noodle (inclusive of the warmer bag, plastic container and cutlery). It was better to eat it at the restaurant. They give two small side dishes (black fungus - really nice! and very salty beans - not to my liking) plus vinegar to be eaten with the noodle. 

I bought takeaway because my hotel is very near from this restaurant (only 3 minutes walk) so the noodle was still warm and the crab roe was still hot when I had it. It was not cheap but I really love the taste. The noodle was thin type, portion was just nice for me as I also takeaway 6 pieces of the Xiao Yang pan fried bun back to hotel. If I just had to eat it alone, perhaps I would order rice to make my stomach fuller. 

There are plenty of restaurants in Shanghai that sell the crab roe noodle. I chose this because it was the nearest from my hotel and it ended up good enough. Plus the staff who took my order was very good and friendly. She asked me not to go anywhere after ordering because it would be ready very fast (since I ordered noodle and had to be eaten fast to prevent soggy). The order really came in about 5 minutes time.

6. Shucaiji Sheng Jian - 舒菜记 生煎菜饭 

Address: Huangpu, 49 Yunnan Rd (Middle) and many other branches

Recommended food: pan fried pork buns - CNY10 for 4 pcs and vegetarian fried rice - CNY15 per plate.

7. Xian De Lai Chop Nian Gao -  鲜得来

Xian De Lai Pork Chop and Nian Gao or rice cake :)

Address: Huangpu, Yunnan South Rd No. 36

Recommended food: fried pork cutlet with 4 pieces of nian gao (rice cake) and soup (with 2 pieces of kind of yong dou fu items) - CNY23 per set.

This is also government operated and owned restaurant. That is why it sells the food with a very affordable prices. According to my local Shanghai friend, this local food was not that popular until one of the Chinese TV drama was taken at this restaurant. Since then, the sales was boosting up and everyone wanted to try the food.

FYI, pour the Xian De Lai soy sauce into your pork cutlet before eating to add the flavor. Not many people know this. Only local Shanghai people know about it :D

8. Wei Xiang Zhai Noodle Restaurant - 味香斋面点 (Michelin)

Address: Huangbu, Hubei Rd No. 151

Recommended food: sesame sauce noodle with scallion  - CNY14 per portion and beef broth - CNY10 per bowl.

Too bad my days were too short in Shanghai. The food here looks so delicious. Maybe one day when I visit Shanghai again, I will drop by and dine here.

9. Jia Jia Tang Bao - 佳家汤包

Address: Huangpu, Huanghe Rd No. 127

Recommended food: pork meat xiao long bao (soup dumpling) 12 pcs/basket - CNY23, scallion oil noddle - CNY12, dry crab roe noodle with soup set - CNY89, 

10. Huxi Lao Nong Tang Pork Liver Noodle - 沪西老弄堂面馆 

Address: Guang dong Rd, No. 500

Recommended food: clam and pig liver noodle - CNY38, large intestine noodle - CNY34, fried pork cutlet - CNY18.

If I have a chance to visit Shanghai again, I will definitely visit this shop!!! A must visit spot for pork liver noodle lover :)

Shanghai snacks/sweets:

1.Shen Dacheng - 沈大成

Shen Dacheng - tasty and sweet green red bean rice ball qingtuan :)

Address: 636 Nanjing Rd (East) - the only Branch that make the fresh one.

Recommended food: shuang niang tuan (双酿团) - CNY5, jin tuan (金团) - CNY5, tiaotou gao (条头糕) - CNY4 and red bean qingtuan (青团) - CNY5 or egg yolk with pork floss qingtuan- CNY8. All is made of glutinous rice. 

2. Shanghai Hongkou Gaotuan Foodstuff Factory - 虹口糕团 

Address: Jingan Nanjing West Rd No. 969 (Tongli Commercial Building F B1)

Recommended food: glutinous rice cakes wrapped with sesame and youtiao 全家福 - CNY10

3. Park Hotel Deli - 国际饭店西饼屋

Park Hotel Deli - famous butterfly (sweet and savory) cookies. Perfect for gifts back home :)

Address: Huangpu, Huanghe Rd No. 28

Recommended food: the original sweet - CNY32 and cheese savory butterfly cookies - CNY35

Got to know about this from my local Shanghai friend. He was the one who recommended me to buy this when I mentioned about the butterfly pastry. The queue was crazy. It took him 70 minutes starting from the + Junction traffic light until the ordering place. He was kindly queueing on my behalf as I had to go back to hotel to pack and check out :D Both flavor are delicious. Each has its unique strength. Worth queueing for!!! :) Fyi, you can smell the fragrant butter while queueing from a far :D

4. Panyongxing Cake - 潘甬兴糕点

Address: Jingan Wujiang Rd No. 269

Recommended food: Tiaotou cake, peppermint cake, mugwort rice cake, citrus cake or juhonggao, Handmade糍毛球 (sticky rice balls), 酒酿糕 osmanthus (fermented rice cake);小米糕 (millet cake) and黑米糕 (black rice cake).

Western Bakery in Shanghai:

It has been a trend these days with the upcoming western bakeries in Shanghai. People post at TikTok bringing awareness of these bakeries that not only having wide variety of breads and cakes, but also have Instragammable outlook. Brands like Butterful and Cremorous, Amamlon Bakery Town, Fascino or Fengshengli, the Bakehouse Grand Liz, Pompi Tiramisu, etc. like what you can see at the photo below. All these can be found near West Nanjing Rd metro.

You can also found good cafes and beverage shops like Birdie Cup Coffee or Xiaoniaobei, Manner Coffee, Chagee Bawang Chaji, Goolden, Tims Tianhao Coffee, and so on.

Birdie cup coffee - Nice one :)

And you can find many at other places too, good place to take a break after walking or shopping too much. Hahahaha.... :P Also the best place to chit chat with old friends :)

Manner Coffee

Since I only had 3 days 2 nights stay in Shanghai, I tried those that I could not find in Singapore. So I had to miss Luckin coffee and Chagee although it was much cheaper than in Singapore :D 

There are many more food establishments that you can visit during your stay in Shanghai. I only covered a few here since I had a short visit this time. But I hope, it could help you for your next visit there. Hope you can enjoy the Shanghai delicacies as I did. Happy eating!!! :)

What apps to download before going to China from Singapore

Shanghai Oriental Pearl Tower

With the advance of the technology, I would say we are very lucky to be able to live in the world these days. The last time I went to China was in the end of 2018 and I could not use the Chinese payment apps like WeChat Pay and Alipay. I had to use cash to pay wherever I went. And sometimes, I would not be able to purchase something (like using the vending machine to buy drinks). I was reluctant to use my credit card to pay too, since the exchange rate given by the bank was awful and there was other charges for using it. 

Trust Visa Debit/ Credit Card (Photo source: Trustbank.sg)

First of all, if you live in Singapore, the digital bank and cards like Trust and YouTrip are the two great assets that you must have beforehand, because they offer the online currency rates - not far from what you usually check from XE.com, there is 0% foreign transaction fee (not even the 1% Visa charges), and also no annual card fee to pay. You manage all your money using the apps on your fingertip. 

For the Trust saving, you can earn up to 2.75% p.a. interest rates on your first S$800k depending on how much you put your money in and earn up to 11% savings on groceries and food at Fairprice Group when you spend on your Trust debit card. You can read more details in here. You can also apply their VISA credit card to earn up to 15% cashback on your preferred category and unlimited 1% cashback on all other eligible spend. Read more details here. If you do not have one yet and interested to get one, you can let me know and I can give you a referral code and get yourself S$10 Fairprice e-voucher as a lovely start :) 

YouTrip Mobile Wallet link with Mastercard 
(Photo source: You.co/sg)

As for YouTrip, you can sign up using your local Singapore mobile phone. It is a multi-currency mobile travel wallet with linked Mastercard and money changer in the app.  There are currently 12 wallet currencies in which you can do the money change without having to go down to money changer. The currencies available as for now are: SGD, MYR, AUD, USD, EUR, GBP, JPY, HKD, NZD, CHF, SEK, and THB. 

You can first top up your SGD money using PayNow or to link your bank account for easy transfer. You can also top up using a Visa/ Mastercard but there will be 1.5% fee for Visa Credit. Fees waived for all Mastercards and Visa Debit. 

After topping up your SGD into the account, you can then start the exchange between those 12 available currencies and keep your money there. But when you want to use it overseas, you can pay in any currencies (not only those 12). For example, you can use it in Korea, Taiwan, Indonesia, and so on. They will convert the currency automatically and deduct it from your SGD or other currency balance that you stored. Just tap your card (they will issue and send you a physical card once you sign up), and key in the passcode on the credit card machine for a more secure transaction. And Voila! If you do not have one yet and interested to join, you can let me know too. I will send you the referral link and get yourself S$5 on your account upon confirmation and acceptance :)

With YouTrip, you can also transfer money overseas or send to other YouTrip User. And if you want to take your SGD money back into your bank account, you can do the withdraw through PayNow or transfer back to your local bank account. So it was up to you how you want to manage  your money. You can link WeChat Pay and Alipay with similar cards like Wise or Revolut too, if you already have one. Once you have them, you can link the above cards (no more required to have a local China bank account and credit card) with WeChat and Alipay. 

I post this blog because more people are travelling to China recently due to more available direct (some budget) airlines between countries, the easy access to pay using the Apps, available translation apps (I use Google translation apps so far), available maps App using English (fyi Google map in China does not give an extensive locations and accuracy, some even are misleading), convenient to travel using public transport such as Metro, bus and ferry, with the downloaded Metro apps that were linked to WeChat or Alipay - just scan the QR code at the entry and exit gate, more world class entertainment parks, such as: Universal Studio in Beijing, Disneyland in Shanghai, Pop Mart theme park or Pop Land in Beijing, Legoland in Shanghai (opening in 2025), and so on. 

Chinese apps to download

So, from my recent trips to Shanghai, I did some research before going, and here are the list of the apps I downloaded before going:

1. WeChat

If you have not had the account yet, you can sign up using your local mobile number. Then you can click here on how to link your credit card with WeChat Pay. I linked my YouTrip Mastercard with WeChat Pay. You need to submit your Passport information as a verification, otherwise you cannot use it. 

2. Shanghai Metro apps (linked to WeChat pay). Once you download the no. 1, next you can download the metro apps. In my case, I downloaded the Shanghai Metro app - Discover, Mini Programs, Search Shanghai Metro App - the red color one - and registered. To use it, you need to turn your bluetooth on, then it will produce the QR code, which you can scan when entering and exiting the metro gate. The fee will be charged into the credit card that you linked with in your WeChat Pay.

3. Alipay

This is another very useful payment apps in China, it works similar like Google pay, but with more services. You can click here for more information on how to register your Alipay. Same thing, you need your passport information for verification plus your photo. Then add your foreign credit card under the Bank Cards. For Alipay, I link it with my Trust Visa card. 

The apps can be set in English and there is the floating translation button that you can click too for easier translation from Chinese to English while using the app. 

4. Shanghai Metro apps (linked with Alipay)

Once you download the Alipay, I search e.g. Shanghai metro - I choose Shanghai Metro Daduhui - registered, saved it, and could find it under the My Apps (My Mini-apps). I can copy this apps button into my mobile home as well for easy use. 

Same with the no. 2, you need to turn on your Bluetooth when scanning the QR code at the entrance and exit gate. It is much more convenient than buying the metro ticket manually at the ticket machine. It will save you a lot of time in taking public transport. 

5. Didi Travel (linked with Alipay)

If you go in larger group with elderly or children, you might want to travel around using hire transport service like Grab and Gojek. In China, you use Didi. You can download the mini-app in Alipay or WeChat for Didi service. Follow the instruction on how to use it. I did not try it during my trip in Shanghai as I travel alone and metro is very convenient public transport to go anywhere.

6. Amap

It is very useful map that you can access during your trip in China. You can enter search using English and Chinese language. Click 'Route' to find out how to get there - by driving, metro or bus, cycling, and walking. Just turn your location button on and it will give you various alternative to reach your destination :)

7. Disney Resort

As I visited Disneyland in Shanghai, I downloaded this app beforehand. Here, you can purchase your ticket based on your needs. There is a Super Early Bird One-Day price ticket if you know already when you are going to visit and choose it to get discount, at least 15 days in advance, or Early Bird One-Day price ticket at least 10 days in advance. In fact, so many options to choose. Weekdays and weekend prices are different, so if you visit many days in Shanghai, I recommended you to choose weekdays than weekends.

You can pay the fare using foreign credit card. However, with additional 3% charge. In this case, I tried other alternatives such as: Klook, Traveloka, and Trip.com. At the end, I bought it through Trip.com as it offered the best price among all.

With Disney Resort app, you can use it during your stay in Disneyland. You will use the map function the most. There, you can see how much is the waiting time for each rides. How to get there from your location (you need to turn on your location button) and how many minutes to reach. Where you can have your lunch, snacks, or dinner. Where to shop if you need to get something to bring back home, and so on. They also tell you the schedule of the parades of the day, and toilet locations.

There are more apps you can download based on your needs during your travel in China. I myself is a newbie and not very well in reading Chinese words. It will be better if you have friends from China who use more Chinese apps and have time to explain to you what to download and how to use.

Actually I would love to use their share bike to go around Shanghai by myself, but with the limitation of the area/ location knowledge, plus not knowing much Chinese words, taking metro is more than good to go. But I was lucky enough being able to cycle around in the middle of the Shanghai city with the guide and help of my local Shanghai friend who is familiar with the road there. He also helped me to unlock the bike - using 2 different bike apps from 2 different companies :) 

Meituan share bike in Shanghai

The traffic for bikes have lessen up these days unlike more than 2 decades ago. Now people take more metro, bus, electronic motorcycle, didi, or car to travel around. But it is good for me and they still have bike lane for bicycle and motorcycle users. Many road was covered with big trees at left and right, giving cool shades for riders like us. I was very lucky experiencing it and hope can experience it more next time :D

Oh ya, for mobile access, you need a SIM card that allows you to access Google, what's app, Facebook, or Instagram. In Singapore, you can purchase your physical China SIM or e-SIM from Lazada or Shopee SG. I purchased the ICC China Mainland 3-30 days Unlimited Data SIM card (China Mobile Network). It worked very well during my stay. Just insert it (if you buy physical card) when you reach there, turn the roaming and mobile data on, and you can start using it.

I hope the above info can help you a little in preparing your visit to China. And wish you a wonderful trip to China soon!!! :)

Bukan Siapa Siapa (Nobody)

:)

That night, I felt a sense of peace and emptiness. Emptiness here, in a good way, in the sense that nothing held me down from whatever feelings and emotions that used to bother me a lot, sending me to the roller-coaster ride kind of mood, plus attachment filled with care, worry, and at the same time, love. It took time to get rid and brush off whatever bit that was left behind in the corner of my brain and heart.

As I turned pages of old notes, it brought me to the past for a while. But this time, I could laugh myself off, instead of feeling fury or disappointed. It was all the matter of the past. No longer break me down. No longer affect the present time. 

I lie down freely on my bed. Freedom. Peace. And love, for myself and those who deserved it. 

Bukan Siapa Siapa (Nobody) by Ajahn Brahm

I picked the book from my bed side - Bukan Siapa Siapa (Nobody) - written by Ajahn Brahm, which I found it from book corner in Clarke Quay last month. It was in Indonesian language, perhaps fated for me to pick and read. I had just started reading it, so could not comment much. But let me share with you the review done by one of the readers posted in Goodreads:

"Ajahn Brahm gives a brilliantly cogent and captivating case for developing nibbida--repulsion-- toward all attachments, particularly the body, and the "I, me, and mine" that are at the root of all suffering. Be a "nobody", Ajahn Brahm extols. Who can be the biggest nobody? By being nobody, by not expecting from life what it cannot provide, you can release yourself from suffering. A truly counter-intuitive viewpoint from a culture that enhances the "I, me and mine", Brahm argues for monastic life, and to "extinguish the flame" of rebirth that continually perpetuates the inherent suffering in life. Yes, his case for monastic life presumes the function and reiteration of karma, but Brahm distills Buddha's insights to show that life is STILL suffering, and that suffering is increasing exponentially. The brilliance of Brahm's (the Buddha's) insight is the universal power that comes from simplicity. Brahm uses accessible arguments that belie the complex simplicity of Buddhist metaphysics and psychology. I'm not sure how deeply I will practice the art of disappearing, but it has provided me with unforgettable alternatives for the suffering which is at the heart of existence. If I do not disappear, I have nonetheless gained powerful tools to lessen the grasp of the id and ego, which promise satisfaction, but produce only pain."

"I, me, and mine" - represented ego, the root of all suffering. If it happened to others, 'I' would not feel the pain. But when it happened to 'me', it hurt like hell. And as long as what was lost or broken was not 'mine', I would not feel the pinch either. That was the easiest way to tell you what attachment was. 

But theory was always easier to understand. When things really happened to ourselves, it was really difficult to overcome. And it took time for us to accept the reality, to adjust our mindset, and to relieve the pain. It was fine to be absorbed by sadness, but do not let it hold too long. Many pain in our heart created disease to our physical body without we realized. 

Living and focusing at the present moment. Be aware and mindful of our own feeling. And aim towards something better. Remember, you are not the only one experiencing all the pain. Everyone else does too. Let us heal as time goes by. Time is the best medicine to forgive and forget. Grow wiser, be a better human being. Live, love, and laugh, make others happy in any way that you can. Let go the past. Let bygones be bygones.